TPO-27 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?If people have the opportunity to get a secure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job that would be more satisfying.Use specific reasons and ex
Select a pleasing job is one of the most important decision that anyone has taken during his life. Although some people hold the opinion that people should choose a more secure job has founded, there are others maintaining that people should wait until find the satisfying one. As far as I am concerned, it is better that people choose a job that love it even they have to wait more in that not only does it provide more stimulus to progress in positions but also it causes to increases mental health.
The first reason which should be stated here is that finding a favorable career will motivate people to boost themselves. To begin with, when people has suitable job, they eager to learn more about each aspect of their positions and all time try to research and review new lectures about their career to learn new things. However, a person who just find a secure job without any interests does not have any impetus to find new things and boost his position. he does a hectic job routinely. Take the case of clerk who hired by a company but he has liked to be architect. he just present in company without any energy and does his routine work, all the time just imagine what would have happened if he was a designer, on the other hand, a software engineer who wait until find his satisfying job everyday think how to improve his abilities in programming. how design a application that do works more easily. he will promote as soon as possible.
Another more subtle point is that people find their satisfying job have more self-esteem. a person just takes a secure job most of the time has struggled with himself why he obliged to the this bored work. disaffection of career is one of the most reasons of depression in people. on the other hand, people who liked their job has more self-esteem. their interests motivate them to improve their abilities. due to progress in positions their self-esteem will elevate too. For example, a person chooses a hectic job immediately after his graduation in order to guarantee his future. most of the time he compares himself with others who follow their dreams and become succeed. he blames himself for ruin his future. these senses have a negative effect on their mental health.
To summarize, finding a favorable job has more advantages to people in that they become more motivated and self-esteem. it is high time we stopped overlooking the fact that having a secure job cannot fulfill a peopl's desire while has temporary advantages
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 459, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...find new things and boost his position. he does a hectic job routinely. Take the c...
^^
Line 3, column 571, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...mpany but he has liked to be architect. he just present in company without any ene...
^^
Line 3, column 795, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
... who wait until find his satisfying job everyday think how to improve his abilities in p...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 855, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: How
...o improve his abilities in programming. how design a application that do works more...
^^^
Line 3, column 866, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...is abilities in programming. how design a application that do works more easily. ...
^
Line 3, column 907, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
... application that do works more easily. he will promote as soon as possible. An...
^^
Line 5, column 91, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: A
...r satisfying job have more self-esteem. a person just takes a secure job most of ...
^
Line 5, column 186, Rule ID: DT_DT[2]
Message: Maybe you need to remove the second determiner so that only 'the' or 'this' is left.
Suggestion: the; this
...truggled with himself why he obliged to the this bored work. disaffection of career is o...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 207, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Disaffection
... why he obliged to the this bored work. disaffection of career is one of the most reasons of...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 282, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: On
...e most reasons of depression in people. on the other hand, people who liked their ...
^^
Line 5, column 350, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Their
...o liked their job has more self-esteem. their interests motivate them to improve thei...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 408, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Due
...tivate them to improve their abilities. due to progress in positions their self-est...
^^^
Line 5, column 583, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Most
...ation in order to guarantee his future. most of the time he compares himself with ot...
^^^^
Line 5, column 676, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...follow their dreams and become succeed. he blames himself for ruin his future. the...
^^
Line 5, column 715, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: These
... he blames himself for ruin his future. these senses have a negative effect on their ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 121, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... become more motivated and self-esteem. it is high time we stopped overlooking the...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, look, so, while, for example, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 53.0 43.0788530466 123% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2054.0 1977.66487455 104% => OK
No of words: 434.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.73271889401 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56428161445 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4771117732 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472350230415 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 653.4 618.680645161 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.3188338389 48.9658058833 127% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.3043478261 100.406767564 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8695652174 20.6045352989 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.04347826087 5.45110844103 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 5.5376344086 289% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.255100721078 0.236089414692 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0798870623372 0.076458572812 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0559685242663 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.180826277447 0.150856017488 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0287359187498 0.0645574589148 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 11.7677419355 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.15 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.51 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 10.002688172 125% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.