By and large, it is very important to every student to work hard at school. They have to study hard in order to get good grades and improve their skills. In this regard, there is a controversy among people regarding whether it is a good idea that parents give money to their children for their high grades or not. A popular belief in this regard is that parents should encourage their children by giving them money as their prize for their high grades, whereas the other group of people have a complete opposite view. Personally, I agree with the former. In the following lines, I will attempt to support this idea through 2 reasons.
The first exquisite point to be mentioned is that giving money to children for their good grades will motivate them to study hard. Always, motivation can lead to positive consequences. Unlike the past, the way that people live is quite different. Sometimes, they have to do many different tasks in order to deal with changes happening throughout the world. The same thing is for students. They usually have to study many text book materials in order to prepare themselves for their final exams. In this regard, they sometimes will be tired and sick of studying. Thus, it would be indispensable for parents to encourage them to study hard. One way that they can promote their children is that they offer a prize or money for each high grade that they get in school. In this way, students would be motivated to study hard in order to reach that prize. Hence, through motivation, parents provide a situation in which students study more.
The second reason which deserves some words here is that giving money to students for their grades can lead to independency. One of the most important parents' tasks is that they must prepare their children for the future life. Students will go to schools in order to learn how to live in the future. There, they learn the basic requirements for living in a community. One of the most vital things that students should learn is that how to be independent from their parents. They need to learn that how to make their money. By offering money to students for their high grades in school, parents can teach their children how to live separately from them in the future. Also, in this way, students will learn that how to make their own money for something that they do. Hence, giving money to students for each high grade that they get in school can lead to independency.
To put it everything in a nutshell, giving money to students for their high grades would be a good idea owing to the fact that in this way students would have more incentive to study hard in order to get good grades and improve their skills. Besides, it would be a good practice for them to learn how to make their own money in order to experience an independent life from their parents.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 131, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[1]
Message: The adverb 'Always' is usually not used at the beginning of a sentence.
...rades will motivate them to study hard. Always, motivation can lead to positive conseq...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 274, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...e different. Sometimes, they have to do many different tasks in order to deal with changes hap...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 516, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[7]
Message: The adverb 'sometimes' is usually put between 'will' and 'be'.
Suggestion: will sometimes be
...their final exams. In this regard, they sometimes will be tired and sick of studying. Thus, it wo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, first, hence, if, regarding, second, so, thus, whereas, by and large
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 9.8082437276 194% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 69.0 43.0788530466 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 81.0 52.1666666667 155% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2330.0 1977.66487455 118% => OK
No of words: 504.0 407.700716846 124% => OK
Chars per words: 4.62301587302 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73813722054 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.35374333982 2.67179642975 88% => OK
Unique words: 188.0 212.727598566 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.373015873016 0.524837075471 71% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 700.2 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6003584229 136% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.7232953304 48.9658058833 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.2142857143 100.406767564 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.96428571429 5.45110844103 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.346373644482 0.236089414692 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.111898635727 0.076458572812 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0865045625583 0.0737576698707 117% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.249246793619 0.150856017488 165% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0398854420774 0.0645574589148 62% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 11.7677419355 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.22 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.66 8.01818996416 83% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 86.8835125448 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.