TPO-44 - Independent Writing Task Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing th

Childhood represents one of the most beautiful periods of an individual's life because true friendships are bonded and unforgettable memories with friends and family are created. It is commonly agreed that the most essential element in a human's life is the family, and that's why all the experiences are vital for the harmonious development of the children. In my opinion, it is better for parents to spend time with their children and have fun to play games or sports, because it creates nice memories and because it strengthens the bond between the members of the family. I will explain my statement in the following essay.

First and foremost, spending time with family and doing fun activities are precious memories that will never be forgotten. Moreover, it creates the impression that parents love their children, and enjoy spending time with them. Whereas, when parents are just interested in children's education, children are deprived of affection, and they have the feeling that they must "shine" at school for making their parents be proud of them. Furthermore, this situation creates a lot of pressure, and some children cannot deal with it. For instance, back in high school, one of my colleagues tried to commit suicide because of a bad grade. She was a proficient student, but only for one time, she took a bad grade. Her parents were not happy with her grade and punished her, and as a result, she tried to end her life.

To continue with, spending an enjoyable time together strengthens the bond between parents and children because offsprings learn to trust their parents from many perspectives. When a family spends their leisure time like this, they also discuss various topics and situations, which the children are going to encounter in daily life. Spending a nice time with children improves also the communication, and children are more prone to speak about their own experiences and feelings, whilst this happens less when parents show interest only in education. It is like everything else is not that important to be brought into the discussion. One example is from my own experience. My parents were very busy because they had to work and deal with chores. Whenever they have free time they preferred to help me with homework, instead of playing or even discussing normal subjects. Because of these, I do not have many pleasant memories with my parents from my childhood, and it feels like something is missing from that period. In addition to this, I am not very close to them and I do not tell them many details about my personal life, because it does not feel natural to me. Even when I had problems I avoid telling them about these.

To summarize, parents should spend more time with their offsprings doing fun activities, because one day, they will cherish these memories more than anything else.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 62, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'individuals'' or 'individual's'?
Suggestion: individuals'; individual's
...one of the most beautiful periods of an individuals life because true friendships are bonde...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 238, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'humans'' or 'human's'?
Suggestion: humans'; human's
...ed that the most essential element in a humans life is the family, and thats why all t...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 269, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: that's
...ent in a humans life is the family, and thats why all the experiences are vital for t...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 1170, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[2]
Message: “Even when” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...because it does not feel natural to me. Even when I had problems I avoid telling them abo...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, moreover, so, then, whereas, for instance, in addition, as a result, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 64.0 43.0788530466 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2369.0 1977.66487455 120% => OK
No of words: 477.0 407.700716846 117% => OK
Chars per words: 4.96645702306 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67336384929 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66129821023 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.492662473795 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 718.2 618.680645161 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 8.0 1.86738351254 428% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.3288565614 48.9658058833 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.681818182 100.406767564 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6818181818 20.6045352989 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.31818181818 5.45110844103 98% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.276849626796 0.236089414692 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0872268727046 0.076458572812 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0736306445179 0.0737576698707 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.18447544989 0.150856017488 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0312881130364 0.0645574589148 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 11.7677419355 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.