TPO 44: Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are rel

Essay topics:

TPO 44: Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork. Which of the two approaches do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Today, some parents become so busy so as they have not enough time to spend with their children. In this situation, some people believe that parents should play with children, while others believe that it is better to do excercises which are related to schoolwork. I personaly belive that they should do play with their children and present my points in the following.

First of all, parents who are busy due to their daily works are enough tierd and need some intertainments during the day. Therefore, it is the best time to spend with their children by playing games or sports, such as swimming, socorring, running and so on. Indeed, such an activity, not only would be usefull for their children, but also influence on their body.

Second, on the contrary, when parents are tierd, they have not adequet concentration to focuse on their children's homework. Thus children will annoy by gaining parents's tireness. We know doing some assignements and homeworks, for instance mathematics and physics, need more concentration and if parents are tierd, it will affect on the activity. Thus, it is cleal that it leads to more distraction of students.

In short, to sum up my points, I believe when parents are busy, it is best to spend time with their children by doing some activities such as playing games and sports which are advantage for them and their children. Tierdness of parents and lack of concentration when they are help children are my reasons.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 125, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
... to focuse on their childrens homework. Thus children will annoy by gaining parentss...
^^^^
Line 9, column 323, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'effect'?
Suggestion: effect
...ation and if parents are tierd, it will affect on the activity. Thus, it is cleal that it...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, therefore, thus, while, for instance, in short, such as, first of all, on the contrary, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 43.0788530466 72% => OK
Preposition: 31.0 52.1666666667 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1222.0 1977.66487455 62% => OK
No of words: 247.0 407.700716846 61% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.94736842105 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.96437052324 4.48103885553 88% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63356511781 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 129.0 212.727598566 61% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.522267206478 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 353.7 618.680645161 57% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 20.6003584229 58% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.8433923819 48.9658058833 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.833333333 100.406767564 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5833333333 20.6045352989 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.9166666667 5.45110844103 200% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.404897855941 0.236089414692 172% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.148281080747 0.076458572812 194% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.113601756724 0.0737576698707 154% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.260386487455 0.150856017488 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0970814413705 0.0645574589148 150% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 11.7677419355 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 58.1214874552 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.63 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 47.0 86.8835125448 54% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

More content wanted.
Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.