TPO-46 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.Use specific reasons and exam

Celebrities are affecting societies in different aspects. Managing this effects is very important for goverments. The question of finding most effective ages that affected by celebrities has been a topic of controversy among different sociologists. In my opinion, celebrities are more important to younger people than older people. I have two main reasons for holding this opinion which I will mention in the reminder on this essay.
The first reason coming to mind for supporting the presented idea is associated with social networks. Young people spend a lot of time in different social networks each days. Social networks are the one of the most important ways that celebrities can affect other people. Young people watch their performances on TVs or theatres and follow their daily life style in social networks. On the other hand, old people often aren't interested in social netwroks. Hence, celebrities aren't very important for them. For instance, Cristiano Ronaldo, who is very famous soccer player, is one of the most followed person in social networks and most of his followers are young people.
Finding symbol is other reasons advocating my idea about the topic. Young people always want to find symbol for their life. Celebrities are the people who are successful in their careers. So, young people can use celebrities as a symbol for their life. Young children haven't created their own life and can follow the life style of celebrities. But old people have found it and they don't need to follow anyone. Let's use an example to support the idea. Celebrities can create different campaigns in social networks for special issues and young people follow these campaigns because they trust celebrities. For example, we had a campaign in my country, Iran, for buying Iranian products which was followed since celebrities have joined the campaign.
In conclusion, celebrities are more important for young children because most of young children follow them in social networks and celebrities are the symbol for young people in life style.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
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...mention in the reminder on this essay. The first reason coming to mind for supp...
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...ks. On the other hand, old people often arent interested in social netwroks. Hence, c...
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... in social netwroks. Hence, celebrities arent very important for them. For instance, ...
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...ost of his followers are young people. Finding symbol is other reasons advocati...
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...a symbol for their life. Young children havent created their own life and can follow t...
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.... But old people have found it and they dont need to follow anyone. Lets use an exam...
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...it and they dont need to follow anyone. Lets use an example to support the idea. Cel...
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... celebrities have joined the campaign. In conclusion, celebrities are more impo...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, if, so, for example, for instance, in conclusion, in my opinion, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 34.0 52.1666666667 65% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1717.0 1977.66487455 87% => OK
No of words: 330.0 407.700716846 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20303030303 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.26214759535 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63296367319 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 160.0 212.727598566 75% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.484848484848 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 521.1 618.680645161 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 9.59856630824 21% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.0793891922 48.9658058833 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 78.0454545455 100.406767564 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.0 20.6045352989 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.59090909091 5.45110844103 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.143612246653 0.236089414692 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0553546747571 0.076458572812 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0640247107723 0.0737576698707 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.099759007001 0.150856017488 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0246034004319 0.0645574589148 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 11.7677419355 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.29 10.9000537634 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.78 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 86.8835125448 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.