TPO-47 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is important to know about events happening around the world, even if it is unlikely that they will affect your daily life.

Everyday variety of events take place around the world which grabs attention of people. Obviously, like every matter there exists two different attitudes toward the event. Some people take care about the events and would like follow them and some just try to ignore them. It can not be doubted that some events such as natural disasters or crimes would adversely affect our live, however, being informed about most of the events can be very beneficial, especially. Personally I hold the opinion that we must follow the events happening worldwide for specific reasons which I am going to describe some dominant ones in the following paragraphs.
To begin with, I should emphasize that I believe in "butterfly effect". Nowadays, there is a theory around that every phenomenon in the world affect whole world. The theoreticians explain it by flight of a butterfly and put the theory forward by saying that when the flight pushes the surrounding air it enforces the air molecules to move and the movement passes to other molecules and goes to the adjacent one and the process goes ahead which at the end influences all world. By introducing the theory, I would say that I strongly opposes that events in the world are unlikely to influence our lives. This means that I believe every trivial event would affect my life at the end. Therefore, I need to be aware of the events happening in the world.
Furthermore, Knowledge and information can be gained through the events. When I get informed by an event such as a technology exhibition overseas, it gives me information about the last progress and achievements in that field. It was couple of days ago, I read an article on the Internet about a an artificial intelligent device which can stimulate the brain to recall some events from the past that it has already forgot. Although it is unlikely that I buy or need such a device, however it provides me information about the artificial intelligence usage. To clarify my mean, it might happen for me to learn some about the technology in the future to apply it in my own field of study.
After taking the positive aspects of the issue into account , I strongly believe that we should be aware of what happening in the world to be informed and get knowledge.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 153, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'effect'?
Suggestion: effect
...ound that every phenomenon in the world affect whole world. The theoreticians explain it by ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 543, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[1]
Message: The pronoun 'I' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'oppose'
Suggestion: oppose
...the theory, I would say that I strongly opposes that events in the world are unlikely t...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 295, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...I read an article on the Internet about a an artificial intelligent device which ...
^
Line 3, column 295, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'a' or 'an' is left.
Suggestion: a; an
...I read an article on the Internet about a an artificial intelligent device which can...
^^^^
Line 3, column 416, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'forgotten'.
Suggestion: forgotten
...vents from the past that it has already forgot. Although it is unlikely that I buy or ...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 60, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...sitive aspects of the issue into account , I strongly believe that we should be aw...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, however, if, so, therefore, such as, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1875.0 1977.66487455 95% => OK
No of words: 390.0 407.700716846 96% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80769230769 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44391917772 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69464012799 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 212.727598566 95% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.517948717949 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 605.7 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.0241609358 48.9658058833 127% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.294117647 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.9411764706 20.6045352989 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.45110844103 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.17800676093 0.236089414692 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.064333757298 0.076458572812 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0375088203843 0.0737576698707 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.100817912268 0.150856017488 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0440007914411 0.0645574589148 68% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 11.7677419355 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.91 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.33 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 86.8835125448 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.