TOEFL T P O 48 - Integrated Writing Task

Essay topics:

TOEFL T P O 48 - Integrated Writing Task

The passage in the reading talks about the injuries of wild brids caused by glasses in the buildings and presents three ways to solve this. The lecturer, however, refutes these solutions by stating them to be ineffective.

Firstly, the reading proposes to use one-way glass in the buildings, so that the bird will not see through them and will perceive it as a solid barrier and will avoid it. but, the lecturer points out that the one-way glass is just as bad as the regular glass as the one-way glass acts as a mirror. If the birds see the reflection of sky or a tree on the one-way glass they will perceive it as the open air and will try to fly through it. so, this solution will not work.

Secondly, the passage suggests to paint the glass windows with stripes. The birds will then avoid flying through by seeing the stripes. The lecturer, however, rebuts this idea by stating that the birds will consider the unpainted portion of the glass to be holes or openings, which will lead them to try to fly through them. To prevent this, the unpainted portions of the glasses need to be very small. but, this will make the interior of the building darker as there will less light passing through the small openings.

Finally, the passage posits to create and use artificial magnetic field to steer away the birds from the path of the building. this idea is based on the knowledge that birds use earth's magnetic field to navigate. Although, the lecturer agrees with the passage that birds use earth's magnetic field to navigate, he added that bidrs use this navigation technique only while the are migrating from one country to another. they don't use the magnetic field to navigate for shorter routes like moving from one end of the city to another end. In addition, he said that, for this shorter distances birds depends on their eyes and the brightness of the light. so, this solution will not be effective too.

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2019-10-08 Hmn 3 Read full essay
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 13, column 404, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...s of the glasses need to be very small. but, this will make the interior of the bui...
^^^
Line 13, column 460, Rule ID: COMP_THAN[3]
Message: Comparison requires 'than', not 'then' nor 'as'.
Suggestion: than
...ake the interior of the building darker as there will less light passing through t...
^^
Line 19, column 128, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...he birds from the path of the building. this idea is based on the knowledge that bir...
^^^^
Line 19, column 372, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...se this navigation technique only while the are migrating from one country to another. ...
^^^^^^^
Line 19, column 419, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
... migrating from one country to another. they dont use the magnetic field to navigate...
^^^^
Line 19, column 424, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ating from one country to another. they dont use the magnetic field to navigate for ...
^^^^
Line 19, column 651, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...r eyes and the brightness of the light. so, this solution will not be effective to...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, second, secondly, so, then, while, in addition

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 10.4613686534 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 5.04856512141 257% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 12.0772626932 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 22.412803532 134% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 49.0 30.3222958057 162% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 5.01324503311 120% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1595.0 1373.03311258 116% => OK
No of words: 340.0 270.72406181 126% => OK
Chars per words: 4.69117647059 5.08290768461 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29407602571 4.04702891845 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.25620252349 2.5805825403 87% => OK
Unique words: 164.0 145.348785872 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.482352941176 0.540411800872 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 461.7 419.366225166 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.55342163355 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 3.25607064018 215% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 10.0 8.23620309051 121% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.25165562914 160% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 13.0662251656 130% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 21.2450331126 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.9674848877 49.2860985944 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.8235294118 110.228320801 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 21.698381199 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.23529411765 7.06452816374 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 4.19205298013 167% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 4.33554083885 208% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 4.45695364238 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.272083759551 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.0996497079465 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0662205650399 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.162205337803 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0443174109184 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 13.3589403974 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 53.8541721854 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 11.0289183223 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 12.2367328918 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.55 8.42419426049 90% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 63.6247240618 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.7273730684 84% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.498013245 95% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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