TOEFL Writing Question 1Productivity and RewardsAn important management principle is that when behavior is rewarded, it tends to be repeated. It follows that in many business enterprises, the approach to getting employees to work hard or improve productiv

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TOEFL Writing Question 1

Productivity and Rewards

An important management principle is that when behavior is rewarded, it tends to be repeated. It follows that in many business enterprises, the approach to getting employees to work hard or improve productivity is to reward them with money or company stock. In addition, some enterprises use other forms of compensation such as special privileges or perhaps promotion or job reassignments or even company-paid luxury vacations and other bonuses in kind. All such rewards are usually tied in to some index of performance, which precisely calculates the relative amount of increased productivity.
Whatever the type of reward given, managerial consultants point out that the promise of such incentives improves employee attitudes, motivation, and productivity. Typical business handbooks describing compensation methods advocate giving the greatest rewards to those who perform the best. For example, a well-known academic text on incentives points out that "the closer the link between job performance and rewards, the greater the motivational effect."
Advocates of improving productivity through rewards tacitly accept that people are rather like physical bodies that require the application of some external motivating force to be set in motion. Furthermore, they argue that any such incentives must have a high perceived value to the employee and must also be perceived as within the reach of that person. If the productivity goal appears beyond the reach of the person striving for the reward, then the motivational effect will be lower and productivity may decline. But if the reward system is correctly structured, productivity experts argue, it is possible to persuade people to achieve remarkable results.

The article states that reward should be given to employee in order to achieve more productivity. and provides three reasons of support. However, Professor explains that by giving rewards to employee may reduce the productivity and refutes each of the author's reasons.

First, the reading claims that some enterprises offers compensations such as special promotions, extra priviledges or luxury vacations in order to make employee happy and that will increase productivity. The professor refutes this point by saying that what if employee don't want to go on vacation. Employee may want rewards in terms of money. He or she want to be paid extra for their hard work. He states that this might demotivate employee.

Second, the article posits that if promises are given to employee that they will be rewarded it will improve employee's attitude, motivation and this all will converted into increase in productivity. The professor refutes this point by saying that such promises might work negetively. He states that company will value them only if they work hard. They may be feel manipulated by their senior management. This may deteriorate company's productivity.

Third, the reading says that greater reward should be given to the person who perform the best. The professor opposes this point by saying that this policy of rewarding might worsen the relation between the manager and their employee. He says that what if employee get more rewards or money then his successive manager. The in future his manager may be jelous of him and he will not support in his decision and show his employee's talent to higher management to grow further.

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by giving rewards to employee may reduce the productivity and refutes each of the author's reasons.
giving rewards to employee may reduce the productivity and refutes each of the author's reasons.
by giving rewards to employee it may reduce the productivity and refutes each of the author's reasons.

some enterprises offers compensations
some enterprises offer compensations

if employee don't want to go on vacation
if employees don't want to go on vacation

He or she want to be paid extra
He or she wants to be paid extra

They may be feel manipulated
They may feel manipulated

to the person who perform the best.
to the person who performs the best.
to the persons who perform the best.

employee get more rewards or money then his successive manager.
employees get more rewards or money than his successive managers.

Sentence: First, the reading claims that some enterprises offers compensations such as special promotions, extra priviledges or luxury vacations in order to make employee happy and that will increase productivity.
Error: priviledges Suggestion: privileges

Sentence: The professor refutes this point by saying that such promises might work negetively.
Error: negetively Suggestion: negatively

Sentence: The in future his manager may be jelous of him and he will not support in his decision and show his employee's talent to higher management to grow further.
Error: jelous Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 16 12
No. of Words: 269 250
No. of Characters: 1348 1200
No. of Different Words: 133 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.05 4.2
Average Word Length: 5.011 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.579 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 75 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 48 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.812 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.915 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.354 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.529 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.149 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4