tpo46

Essay topics:

tpo46

Both the reading and listening parts offer two opposite views about the benefits of electronic databases in the field of medicine. While the passage lists three advantages of electrical record to the traditional one; the professor, on the other hand, casts doubt on the accuracy of those benefits. She also presents some clues to call those merits into the question.
    The first benefit which is disapproved by the instructor is the reduction of cost which in the article asserts that the electrical database declines the cost of storing the data. As she claims the usage of the electrical database does not lead to the saving the cost of the storage; since even with the usage of this new system, doctors do not throw away the paper-based record. Those papers are stored for the backup or for the legal cases which the signature of patients is required. Thus, the electronic system does not efficient in the financial aspect.
   Another advantage which is discussed in the text is the prevention of error caused by the illegible handwriting or improper transcription; on the contrast, the lecturer refutes this merit too. According to her explanation, even with the use of the electronic database, doctors do use pens and papers during the examination period and their initial notes are written manually. Also, all those notes latterly are copied and pasted into the electronic database by the staffs working in the hospital. Consequently, the possibility of making mistakes also exists, and the usage of a novel recording system does not prevent those errors.
    Finally, meanwhile, the paper highlighted the accessibility of data by the electronic database for the researchers, aids the researchers to conveniently do their studies; the professor, on the contrary, disapproves this benefit too. Based on her assertation, the accessibility of patient’s data is subjected to the privacy law, and this law lets the patient, according to his wish, to keep its record private and block it to other people. So, no matter whether the data are preserved in the paper or electronic base, as long as doctors and researchers want to conduct research, they have to go through a complicated and restricted process of getting permission from different organization and patients. So, this new system of recording does not aid the medical researchers.
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Votes
Average: 8 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...o call those merits into the question.     The first benefit which is disapproved b...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ot efficient in the financial aspect.    Another advantage which is discussed in ...
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Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... system does not prevent those errors.     Finally, meanwhile, the paper highlighte...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, finally, first, if, so, thus, while, on the contrary, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 10.4613686534 96% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 5.04856512141 0% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 7.30242825607 178% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 12.0772626932 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 21.0 22.412803532 94% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 30.3222958057 178% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 5.01324503311 160% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1994.0 1373.03311258 145% => OK
No of words: 380.0 270.72406181 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.24736842105 5.08290768461 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41515443553 4.04702891845 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03251538899 2.5805825403 118% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 145.348785872 140% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.534210526316 0.540411800872 99% => OK
syllable_count: 622.8 419.366225166 149% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 3.25607064018 123% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.23620309051 85% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.25165562914 240% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 2.5761589404 272% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 13.0662251656 107% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 21.2450331126 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 71.4980019701 49.2860985944 145% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.428571429 110.228320801 129% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.1428571429 21.698381199 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.5 7.06452816374 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 4.19205298013 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 4.33554083885 161% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 4.45695364238 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.27373068433 94% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.388652581687 0.272083759551 143% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.118775728372 0.0996497079465 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0545072064227 0.0662205650399 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.217891797583 0.162205337803 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0795330818555 0.0443174109184 179% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.9 13.3589403974 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 53.8541721854 82% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 5.55761589404 202% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 11.0289183223 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 12.2367328918 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.67 8.42419426049 115% => OK
difficult_words: 113.0 63.6247240618 178% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 10.7273730684 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.498013245 122% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.2008830022 125% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Write the essay in 20 minutes.

Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.