Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program, and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world. Many of our students have gone on to become professional dancers with top dance companies.
The author here states that Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for an child. Of all the dance schools in Elmtown, Pirouettes has the most intensive program. He further states that their teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies in the world. Author is very confident about his school and its achievements which is undoubtedly good.
With the fact that their teachers have danced in most prestigious ballet companies does not substantiate enough about the Pirouettes being the first choice of students, there could be many more reasons to it. Maybe, Elmtown does not have any other ballet school due to which Pirouettes is the only school where people can join. Author has not considered location and average occupation of the people in that area. It can be possible that traditionally world's best ballet dancers resided in Elmtown and they started this school. Consequently, resulting inherited dancing skills. Therefore, author should take care of other aspects before brining up his assumptions.
Author also states that many of their students have gone to become professional dancers with top dance companies. Here author has overshadowed the career choices as a profession made by other students. There could be more number of people pursuing job in IT fields or in medical fields. However, author did not count any profession other than dance. They might have come to Pirouettes Ballet school as an hobby during their school days but not as to become a dancer.
Parents occupation also plays a vital role in defining child's profession. It has been observed that doctor's child opts for medical inadvertently knowing of other career choices. Lawyer's child become lawyer and continues family legacy of being lawyer. This could be one of another reasons which author have ignored. Many students who join Pirouettes Ballet School might be children of great dancers who has inherited knowledge of Ballet dancing. These facts can not be ignored, society plays a very important role in deciding career, it can not be considered inconsequential.
Author could have been more pragmatic in placating that his school is the best among all the Ballet school. He could have taken more better and concise examples in order to attract more admission to his school. He says that their teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies. We all should adhere to the fact that not all performers are great preachers. I mean that one who is good at doing something, may not be good at teaching same thing to others. So if author takes pride in his school's teacher's dancing ability, he should also check with their teaching credibility.
Thus, I would say that author is taking pride in this school which is good, but he could have taken pride i the right thing in a right way rather than just extrapolating his school's credibility on some mere assumptions.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 78, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...s Ballet School is the clear choice for an child. Of all the dance schools in Elmt...
^^
Line 3, column 453, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[4]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'worlds the best'.
Suggestion: worlds the best
.... It can be possible that traditionally worlds best ballet dancers resided in Elmtown and t...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 375, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'pirouette'.
Suggestion: Pirouette
...her than dance. They might have come to Pirouettes Ballet school as an hobby during their ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 403, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...ave come to Pirouettes Ballet school as an hobby during their school days but not ...
^^
Line 9, column 129, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'better' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: better
... the Ballet school. He could have taken more better and concise examples in order to attrac...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 125, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a right way" with adverb for "right"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ould have taken pride i the right thing in a right way rather than just extrapolating his scho...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'consequently', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'therefore', 'thus', 'as to', 'i mean']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.255319148936 0.25644967241 100% => OK
Verbs: 0.189555125725 0.15541462614 122% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0851063829787 0.0836205057962 102% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0657640232108 0.0520304965353 126% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0522243713733 0.0272364105082 192% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.112185686654 0.125424944231 89% => OK
Participles: 0.0676982591876 0.0416121511921 163% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.60038027874 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0174081237911 0.026700313972 65% => OK
Particles: 0.00193423597679 0.001811407834 107% => OK
Determiners: 0.0676982591876 0.113004496875 60% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0328820116054 0.0255425247493 129% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0154738878143 0.0127820249294 121% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2894.0 2731.13054187 106% => OK
No of words: 477.0 446.07635468 107% => OK
Chars per words: 6.06708595388 6.12365571057 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67336384929 4.57801047555 102% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.377358490566 0.378187486979 100% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.236897274633 0.287650121315 82% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.157232704403 0.208842608468 75% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.106918238994 0.135150697306 79% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60038027874 2.79052419416 93% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 207.018472906 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.463312368973 0.469332199767 99% => OK
Word variations: 52.4651844215 52.1807786196 101% => OK
How many sentences: 28.0 20.039408867 140% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0357142857 23.2022227129 73% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.9385175885 57.7814097925 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.357142857 141.986410481 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.0357142857 23.2022227129 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.428571428571 0.724660767414 59% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.14285714286 117% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 3.58251231527 167% => OK
Readability: 40.725441749 51.9672348444 78% => OK
Elegance: 1.41509433962 1.8405768891 77% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.514476720829 0.441005458295 117% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0796903707377 0.135418324435 59% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0791901833646 0.0829849096947 95% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.444038488756 0.58762219726 76% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.157305419928 0.147661913831 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.169591755423 0.193483328276 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.162954460393 0.0970749176394 168% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.315285889775 0.42659136922 74% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.106188183679 0.0774707102158 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.326320396181 0.312017818177 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.183038043597 0.0698173142475 262% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 8.33743842365 192% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.87684729064 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.82512315271 228% => Less neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 12.0 6.46551724138 186% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 5.36822660099 19% => More negative topic words wanted.
Neutral topic words: 6.0 2.82389162562 212% => OK
Total topic words: 19.0 14.657635468 130% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.