The following appeared in a letter to the editor in the journal Health Matters. Statistics gathered over the past three decades show that the death rate is higher among those who do not have jobs than among those with regular employment. Unemployment, jus

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The following appeared in a letter to the editor in the journal Health Matters. Statistics gathered over the past three decades show that the death rate is higher among those who do not have jobs than among those with regular employment. Unemployment, jus

Here the author argues that due to increased unemployment the date rate has increased and government increasing to spend on the medical research and public health would be foolishness. The author does not give proper statistics and information about the type of death rate. Hence, the above argument seems to fallacious.

The author states that because of unemployment the death rate is higher. Is the death rate higher all over the country or just in a particular state. If it is in particular state then, what percentage of people are senior citizens. Because, senior citizens are usually unemployed and because they are old, the death rate maybe high in that area. Hence, the author should give more information about this issue.

Also, the author does not mention the type of deaths. For example, are they because of accidents or suicide or natural death. If it is because of any of these types then certainly unemployment is not the only reason for the increase in the death rate.
People who are employed even they may have shorter period of life because of the stress they are undergoing, not able to find time for exercises and not having healthy food all these will effect the health and may lead to serious health problems like heart attack, blood pressure problems and other heart related diseases. People who are working sometimes find real difficult to have a healthy lifestyle, because they do not find time to exercise, cook and eat healthy food. And because of the stress people tend to drink more alcohol and smoke often which in turn ruins their health. Hence, this also might be the case and because of this the death rate is higher.

The line healthy economy means healthy citizens is not always true. In this generation everyone are looking for shortcuts and always look for comfort. People have less physical activity and eat more unhealthy food which effects their health. Countries with good economy also have citizens with bad health. Health related issues are everywhere in the world. Sometimes it may happen that healthy economy may have unhealthy citizens because, healthy economy means people work so hard that they forget about their health and cultivate bad eating habits and do not have a proper exercise routine.

Because of all the above reasons the statement seems to specious and needs more information to have a successful argument.

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Average: 3.7 (3 votes)
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Sentence: For example, are they because of accidents or suicide or natural death.
Description: The fragment For example , is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is

Sentence: And because of the stress people tend to drink more alcohol and smoke often which in turn ruins their health.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a determiner, possessive
Suggestion: Refer to ruins and their

Sentence: In this generation everyone are looking for shortcuts and always look for comfort.
Description: A pronoun, nominal is not usually followed by a verb 'to be', present tense, 2nd person singular or all
Suggestion: Refer to everyone and are

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 398 350
No. of Characters: 1932 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.467 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.854 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.311 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 94 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.091 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.896 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.313 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.512 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.083 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5