The chart below shows information about the problems people have when they go to live in other countries Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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The chart below shows information about the problems people have when they go to live in other countries.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the percentage of some problems that are experienced by people who live abroad according the range of ages.

Maintaining the health is being the greatest problem for both middle and older age groups, which 36-37 percent of each group has this problem. On the other hand, just 32 % of people aged 35-54 feel hard to stay healthy, which is lower than both range groups.

Also, people who are 35-54 years old have the biggest problem in earning money and controling their expenses, which are 35 % people experience this. However, people over 55 years old are being the lowest gro...

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Average: 9.2 (6 votes)
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according the range of ages.
according to the range of ages.

which are 35 % people experience this.
Description: two verbs in one sentence.

Middle age group again become the group who has the biggest percentage among the other groups, which the problem now is for finding school for their children.
Middle age group again become the group who has the biggest percentage among the other groups, while the problem now is for finding school for their children.

Sentence: Also, people who are 35-54 years old have the biggest problem in earning money and controling their expenses, which are 35 people experience this.
Error: controling Suggestion: controlling

Sentence: There are approximately 18 of this group who feel difficult to get the suitable scool for their children.
Error: scool Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Overall, all of people with different range of ages find both healthcare and finance are the most difficult poblems for people who live in a new country.
Error: poblems Suggestion: problems
Error: healthcare Suggestion: health care

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 205 200
No. of Characters: 963 1000
No. of Different Words: 109 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.784 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.698 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.214 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 60 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 40 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 21 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 13 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.778 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 2.859 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.465 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.771 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.121 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4

Hai Yora, I attempt to learn writing this Task 1 from your writing. Is it task 1 on Student book on page 14?. I read the question is similar, but the contain is different to the data on the graph. I still learning on how to crate grouping, listing to make easy write task 1. Thank you very much

I waiting for your Answer

Warm regards, Dena