Some parents control their children from a very young age and others give freedom to their children. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches? Give your own opinion.
In the past two decades people's lives style has been changed too much. One of these changes is the way we behavior with our children. In the past people believe they must have restricted role and control their children, But there are many people who don’t agree. They argue that they should better give freedom to their children.
It is clear that control children have its advantages and disadvantages. First advantages are you probably know everything about your child. For example, where is he or she right known, who is her or his friend and so on? Secondly, people believe they control their child because for their goodness. Their children do not have enough experience and do not have enough info about everything, so this is parent's responsibilities to take care of them.
The most clearly disadvantages of this idea is children mostly become poor and they are depended on their parents. Unfortunately, we see more examples of these children in our society, even though we they grow up, they can make a decision without their parents. Another disadvantages is the children who are grown up with this idea, in the most time have some psychology problem such as they cannot comminute easily with other people.
On the other hand, the next approach also has both good and bad sides. When we give freedom to our children, we allow them to experience external world by themselves so they can gain a lot of experience. However, we can deny this fact that gain experience is costly and parents should be aware of this unknown costly.
To sum up, from a personal perspective, I prefer to be more moderated. I believe we should have some control roles and meanwhile we must to give some freedom to their children. In fact it must be a balance between these approaches.
Sentence: One of these changes is the way we behavior with our children.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to we and behavior
Sentence: The most clearly disadvantages of this idea is children mostly become poor and they are depended on their parents.
Description: The fragment most clearly disadvantages is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace clearly with adjective
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to is and children
Sentence: Unfortunately, we see more examples of these children in our society, even though we they grow up, they can make a decision without their parents.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to we and they
Sentence: Another disadvantages is the children who are grown up with this idea, in the most time have some psychology problem such as they cannot comminute easily with other people.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to Another and disadvantages
Sentence: Another disadvantages is the children who are grown up with this idea, in the most time have some psychology problem such as they cannot comminute easily with other people.
Error: comminute Suggestion: communicate
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 307 350
No. of Characters: 1427 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.186 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.648 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.511 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 89 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 70 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.056 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.995 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.313 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.498 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.144 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5