some people say that the best way to develope public health is increasing the number of spots facilities. others, however say that it would have a little effect and give other measuring.Discuss both point of view and give your opinion

Essay topics:

some people say that the best way to develope public health is increasing the number of spots facilities. others, however say that it would have a little effect and give other measuring.

Discuss both point of view and give your opinion

These days, some people say that adding the number of sport facilities is the great way to developing the public health. Others think that this needs other measuring and gives effect to the public health. In my opinion, increasing the number of sport facilities will improve the government in health program and help people to keep health. I will discuss both points of view.

There was no denying that health centre is important for people, so that the public health should provides sport facilities nowadays, because this will reduce the number of people sick. A good example for this, rich people will choose sport facilities than waste their money to the hospital. By sport this helps people so much to keep their healthy and most importantly they can do exercises every time they want. As the result, people will be healthy and do not need to worry about the expensive of hospital cost when they are getting sick. So, sport facilities can become an alternative for them.

On the other hand, this would impact to the government expenditure which will become more and more increase of use the government money and this would also gives effect to the public health. For instance, if the government supply a bad facility for their program, they should be ready of people complaining who use the sport facility. So, taking consideration to the risk and more careful are the solution.

In conclusion, giving more facilities of sport looks better and this is very helpful for people to always be health. So that, the public health should have a little fight for this matter

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)

Comments

Sentence: There was no denying that health centre is important for people, so that the public health should provides sport facilities nowadays, because this will reduce the number of people sick.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to should and provides

this would also gives effect to the public health
this would also give effect to the public health

if the government supply a bad facility
if the government supplies a bad facility

they should be ready of people complaining who use the sport facility.
they should be ready for the complaints of people who use the sport facility.

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 269 350
No. of Characters: 1274 1500
No. of Different Words: 134 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.05 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.736 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.307 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 92 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 44 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 31 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 22 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.214 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.292 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.381 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.581 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.082 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5