What would you change one important thing about your hometown?Change to love our environment and culture heritage

Essay topics:

What would you change one important thing about your hometown?

Change to love our environment and culture heritage

West Borneo borders on Natuna Sea and Malaysia Serawak. West Borneo consists of marshes, rivers, lowland and undulating plains. West Borneo has tropic climate and high rainfall namely three thousand millimeters and one hundred and seventy rain days each year. Therefore most of West Borneo districts are agricultural enterprises where coffee, pepper, and clove is planted in highland while orange, tomato, watermelon, cucumber and more are planted in lowland. 28, 1 percent districts of West Borneo are rivers and West Borneo has 3 longest rivers, they are Kapuas, Sambas, and Landak where some society’s life and stories depend on the rivers.

Kapuas river is the longest river in Indonesia and gives many benefits for society of West Borneo namely selling, hiring boat , main line of Industry in West Borneo where barge always pass for carrying coal, petroleum and others. Now days, quality of Kapuas river is reduced by pollution and chemicals of industries that they throw. Step by step, we as native of West Borneo are appealed Pontianak society for loving rubbish and saying that river is not rubbish bin while our science teams are designing a tool for reducing chemicals and polutan of industry so Kapuas River keep cleaning.

Moreover, we carry out a performance in Kapuas town square every week like traditional dance, singing, acting and decorating some boats with various lamps, lampions, flowers so visitors can enjoy and sail what a beautiful Kapuas river in the night. Every year, “sampan laju” competition is carried out for celebrating society party in river nearby Kadariah palace. We do it for attracting and introducing visitors about something special that the visitors can get from Kapuas where Kapuas is not only longest river but also unforgettable memory when the visitors visit it.

Then seven hours from Pontianak, we can find Sambas River where Sambas Tenun came from. Tenun of Sambas is beautiful, original, unique, valuable material from Sembrang village, Sambas. It is culture heritage of King Sulaiman who is titled King Mahmud Tsafijuddin I. Tenun Sambas has been recognizing since three hundred years ago but unfortunately almost extinct while KPOP culture is more famous than our own culture in Indonesia. We are worry about it and original heritage of Indonesia will be forgetting. That’s why students of West Borneo keep conserving and introducing Tenun Sambas to Indonesia and the world even has been building social organization and some enterprises such as UKM. We have presented Tenun Sambas in culture presentation competition and been a winner.

Thenceforth, many abroad designers are interested with Tenun Sambas and wear it for their main design. It proves that Tenun Sambas is national and international quality. Sembrang society now are making a longest Tenun for getting certificate of record Muri and we expect that Tenun Sambas will be one icon of Indonesia and we will proud of our original product. Let’s conserve and love Indonesia product, this to show our dedication and love for our town and Indonesia.

Votes
Average: 5.5 (2 votes)

Comments

Now days,
Nowadays,

Sentence: Step by step, we as native of West Borneo are appealed Pontianak society for loving rubbish and saying that river is not rubbish bin while our science teams are designing a tool for reducing chemicals and polutan of industry so Kapuas River keep cleaning.
Description: The fragment River keep cleaning is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace keep with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular

even has been building social organization and some enterprises such as UKM.
even it has been building social organization and some enterprises such as UKM.

Sentence: We have presented Tenun Sambas in culture presentation competition and been a winner.
Description: The token and is not usually followed by a verb 'to be', past participle
Suggestion: Refer to and and been

Sembrang society now are making a longest Tenun
Sembrang society now is making the longest Tenun

Sentence: Step by step, we as native of West Borneo are appealed Pontianak society for loving rubbish and saying that river is not rubbish bin while our science teams are designing a tool for reducing chemicals and polutan of industry so Kapuas River keep cleaning.
Error: polutan Suggestion: popular

Sentence: Moreover, we carry out a performance in Kapuas town square every week like traditional dance, singing, acting and decorating some boats with various lamps, lampions, flowers so visitors can enjoy and sail what a beautiful Kapuas river in the night.
Error: lampions Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2

Still you have grammar issues.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 492 350
No. of Characters: 2510 1500
No. of Different Words: 255 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.71 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.102 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.508 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 199 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 129 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.303 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.333 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.566 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.206 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5