Nowadays, sport is becoming a big business with high earning for professional sportsmen and a lot of companies have involved in financially and in other ways.
Is this a positive or negative development?
Sport has turned out as a multi-billion-dollar industry thanks to the involvement of business firms, which economically benefits athletes. While I accept that this tendency exerts advantageous impacts on the society, I believe that it also brings about several drawbacks.
On the one hand, when money is poured into sports, it acts as a catalyst for a positive development by two major reasons. Regarding to athletes, their participation in sport merchandising, such as the endorsement of sporting goods, is believed to substantially upgrade their incomes. As a result, they may find it easier to earn a living and assure a decent life, compared to their predecessors in the past and, therefore, can completely focus on their career and boost their achievement. Regarding to the nation’s sports, its prosperity is expected to eradicate the stereotype that athletes never reap an adequate remuneration to their dedications and efforts. Therefore, this will motivate more youngsters to take up sports, which may provides a huge number of potential sport professions for the country.
On the other hand, when sport is transformed into a business, it also contributes to the emergence of many problems. Firstly, the engaging economic output is sometimes prioritized over the Olympic ideal by athletes. Consequently, this leads to a win-at-all-cost attitude, which drives sportsmen to illegal behaviors, like using performance-enhancing drugs. Secondly, a more serious challenge stems from sports betting, which may make athletes turn into crime due to getting involved in match fixing, as we see in football recently, when many Vietnamese players were disqualified from participation due to being manipulated by sports betting criminals. If athletes are not mature enough, the financial outcome will jeopardized their careers by eroding moral characters.
In conclusion, I opine that when people commercialize sports, not only does this create beneficial effects but also promotes many obstacles.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 273, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...it also brings about several drawbacks. On the one hand, when money is poured in...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 716, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'jeopardize'
Suggestion: jeopardize
...ture enough, the financial outcome will jeopardized their careers by eroding moral characte...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, firstly, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, in conclusion, such as, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 13.1623246493 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 7.85571142285 76% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 24.0651302605 104% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 41.998997996 107% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.3376753507 108% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1706.0 1615.20841683 106% => OK
No of words: 303.0 315.596192385 96% => OK
Chars per words: 5.6303630363 5.12529762239 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.17215713816 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.36336502505 2.80592935109 120% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 176.041082164 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.643564356436 0.561755894193 115% => OK
syllable_count: 528.3 506.74238477 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 5.43587174349 166% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.10420841683 333% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.811435269 49.4020404114 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.230769231 106.682146367 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.3076923077 20.7667163134 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.9230769231 7.06120827912 169% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.139901733249 0.244688304435 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0458937278074 0.084324248473 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0297388847749 0.0667982634062 45% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0742174151767 0.151304729494 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0268951471282 0.056905535591 47% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.7 13.0946893788 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.67 12.4159519038 126% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.25 8.58950901804 119% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 78.4519038076 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 9.78957915832 123% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.