do you agree of disagree with the following statement? It is important to know what is
happening around the world, even if it does not affect your personal lives.
In today's competitive and convoluted world, it becomes a highly charged and hot topic whether people should know about what is happening around them or not. Some people are the leading the opinion of the claim that it can be useful for them to increase their knowledge and awareness of their environment. However, others may take an opposite point of view and believe that there is no need to learn something is occurring around them or there is no business in their lives. For this reason, if I have to face these two choices, I tend to choose the latter point. There are some important reasons, the most outstanding of which will be discussed in the ensuing paragraphs.
To begin with, due to the soaring of the population, people's lives condition are becoming more complex. To elaborate on, the most important duties of people are meeting their basic needs not knowing what is happening around them, and even, it is more disaster to spend their time on something which there is no relationship among their lives and it. Let me give you an example might make this viewpoint much more evident. Nowadays, all of the people are talking about World cup 2018 in Russia, which I am really not interested in football and this festival. I am preparing for the TOEFL tests and I should not care about this event which takes my time. Hence, If I start reading about this event, which is holding nowadays, instead of my exam, imagine the result of my exam how could be, I am sure that it would be disaster.
Apart from taking care of our personal life and benefit, the second debatable point is that on the one hand, some people believe that it would be a great amusement in order to fill people's spare time. On the other hand, some people believe that their free time should be consumed on something which has a positive contribution to their life, such as learning more about their job or spending their time in tandem with their family. I take the former viewpoint with a pinch of salt and claim that the latter viewpoint is much more beneficial, for I do believe that the more people spend their time on learning more about their jobs, the more they make progress in their job result in job promotion and prosperous lives. As a result, people would be successful if they spend their precious time on something is in direct proportion to their thriving.
To wrap it up, by considering all aforementioned reasons, one soon realizes that people should not pay attention to something is occurring around them inasmuch as in the first place, nowadays, people are involving with many issues engaging their mind and it is better to focus on them, and in the second place, they should spend their time on something that brings them more benefits such as studying more about their jobs and how to improve their ability to reach the pinnacle of their job.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 433, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
... viewpoint much more evident. Nowadays, all of the people are talking about World cup 2018...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 201, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...as in the first place, nowadays, people are involving with many issues engaging their mind an...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, however, if, may, really, second, so, apart from, such as, talking about, as a result, to begin with, in the first place, in the second place, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 15.1003584229 172% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 70.0 43.0788530466 162% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 70.0 52.1666666667 134% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2347.0 1977.66487455 119% => OK
No of words: 503.0 407.700716846 123% => OK
Chars per words: 4.66600397614 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73578520332 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.40095511194 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.459244532803 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 725.4 618.680645161 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 31.0 20.1344086022 154% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 100.07551836 48.9658058833 204% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 146.6875 100.406767564 146% => OK
Words per sentence: 31.4375 20.6045352989 153% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.1875 5.45110844103 205% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0786632773779 0.236089414692 33% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0329939146298 0.076458572812 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0350966638698 0.0737576698707 48% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0568627821163 0.150856017488 38% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0274263300887 0.0645574589148 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.3 11.7677419355 139% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.93 58.1214874552 98% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 10.1575268817 128% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.4 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 86.8835125448 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.4 10.0537634409 143% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.