In general, people think that traveling in their own country allows people to be more beneficial. They support that it provides them to consider about where they live again. However, the notion does not reflect the stance that I hold and should not be thought about in a different light. I believe that it is more beneficial for people to travel to foreign countries because they are able to broaden their perspectives and improve themselves.
First of all, during traveling to foreign countries, people are able to have broad perspectives. To be specific, in today’s globalized world, companies require their employee to have international views as the basic skill. People could not survive in competitive societies without the views in every business areas and be also required to be global minded and culturally sensitive. They could do this better by traveling to outside of their own country. For example, when I was in university, I traveled five countries including China, Japan, United Stated, Bulgaria and Singapore. During the traveling, I was able to meet a lot of foreign friends there and have kept in touch with them. It allows me to develop my international views and was my great memories in my life. Thus, this shows that it is more beneficial for people to travel all over the world than in their own country because they are able to broaden their perspectives.
Moreover, travelling to other countries enables people to improve themselves. In other word, people are able to be self-developed without any support from other people. Today’s young people are likely to be dependent on their parents without any thinking, which make them to be less half-fledged in their life. However, during travelling all over the world, people have a lot of opportunities to think and improve themselves as a member of modern society because they should survive in unknown places without other’s help. For example, after graduated in university, I went to developing countries, Malaysia and Vietnam. At that time, I wanted to improve myself as survive in developing countries, not in developed countries. It was the best opportunity to consider myself and learn how to act in other culture, outside of my own country. As a result, this shows that visiting foreign countries allows people to improve themselves in many aspects, which would be beneficial for them.
To sum up, I believe that it is more beneficial for people to visit foreign countries than in their own country. This is because it makes people to broaden their perspectives and improve themselves during their travelling. Consequently, the importance of my views cannot be underestimated in that it can kill two birds with one stone for the reasons I have mentioned above. All in all, this trend will probably continue for the next generations.
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'consequently', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'moreover', 'so', 'thus', 'for example', 'in general', 'as a result', 'first of all', 'to sum up']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.178907721281 0.229887763892 78% => OK
Verbs: 0.171374764595 0.158761421928 108% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0960451977401 0.0866891130778 111% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0395480225989 0.046263068375 85% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0960451977401 0.0685040099705 140% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.141242937853 0.118717715034 119% => OK
Participles: 0.030131826742 0.0351676179071 86% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.86600916884 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0546139359699 0.0309702414327 176% => OK
Particles: 0.00188323917137 0.00188951952338 100% => OK
Determiners: 0.0546139359699 0.0887237588012 62% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.015065913371 0.0209618222197 72% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00941619585687 0.0139019557991 68% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2828.0 2387.08602151 118% => OK
No of words: 465.0 408.028673835 114% => OK
Chars per words: 6.08172043011 5.86048508987 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64369019777 4.48200974243 104% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.384946236559 0.338922669872 114% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.286021505376 0.251872472559 114% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.187096774194 0.174417080927 107% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.135483870968 0.112833075102 120% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86600916884 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 212.727598566 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.434408602151 0.524397521467 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 48.2517390546 59.2087087015 81% => OK
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6684587814 116% => OK
Sentence length: 19.375 20.5533526081 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.5931712915 48.84282405 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.833333333 120.699889404 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.375 20.5533526081 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.541666666667 0.644075263715 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.5376344086 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.54480286738 0% => OK
Readability: 47.9771505376 45.7405998639 105% => OK
Elegance: 1.14110429448 1.45489161554 78% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.34723263736 0.300154397459 116% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.113397705461 0.103427244359 110% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0869346658027 0.0752933317313 115% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.482775784791 0.497263757937 97% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.0747181112703 0.151897553556 49% => Sentences are similar to each other in a paragraph.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.141341764421 0.114077575197 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0640860349759 0.0781384742642 82% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.511096357165 0.336927656856 152% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0623496049329 0.067059652881 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.262763557787 0.210909579961 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.034058657552 0.0618886996521 55% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8870967742 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.86379928315 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.91756272401 122% => OK
Positive topic words: 11.0 8.42114695341 131% => OK
Negative topic words: 2.0 2.4623655914 81% => OK
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.75985663082 109% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 13.6433691756 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.