Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Since the dawn of humanity, success in the job was the one the desire of any individual who wants improve his position in the society. No one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that job is one the most important part of people's life. Not all people concur when this issue arises. Being cognizant to the logic behind those who repudiate or endorse the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that attempting to learning important knowledge in the school and university is more vital for workers to be prosperous in their workplaces in comparison the ability to make a relation with other people. Among a plentitude of reasons in support of this assertion, the impact of having sufficient knowledge in the modern world and increase the chance of promoting the careers could be picked out for further analysis.
To commence with, a consensus has yet to be reached; however, regarding the necessity of enough knowledge for doing some responsibility in the job, based upon the statistics of different general questionnaires in high- technology companies, managers are unanimous about the conviction that workers need some basic and specific knowledge to do some duties. Normally, they should acquire this knowledge in schools and universities. Sometimes occur some situations which worker should decide quickly to take an action, and these decisions need adequate knowledge about their professions. Thus, this accessibility does not obtain without trying hard in schools. Moreover, managers expect that their workers easily find the problems and solve them efficiently. They could prove their ability to their managers and promote in their career. A vivid example can be given to shed light on what was elaborated above. Last two years ago, I was worked in refinery company as an engineer. I work on some Heat-Exchangers and I could optimize their performance based on my knowledge which I obtained them from my university's thesis. My creativity helps me improve my position among other engineer and found a better place in my manager view.
In addition to the reason raised above; the chance for occupying the high position in the workplace could also substantiate the justifiability of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief, companies willing to choose some educated people as a manager for various different parts of their company. They know that educated people based on their knowledge could control the activities in the workplace and manage other workers. The result of a study carried out by Rice University's graduate students unveiled the fact that in the Apple company, Steeve Jobs as its manager has the tendency to some educated people for transferring important duties and he gives them more chances than other.
Drawing upon the above reasons, discreetly put, as far as my personal perspective on the topic is concerned, I reiterate that working hard at the schools is more improtant than improvement of social skills. The knowledge acquired in the schools not only has positve impact on their progress but also makes some chance for people to occupy high positions.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 356, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ce for people to occupy high positions.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, moreover, regarding, so, thus, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 78.0 52.1666666667 150% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2642.0 1977.66487455 134% => OK
No of words: 516.0 407.700716846 127% => OK
Chars per words: 5.12015503876 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76609204519 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77653598828 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 279.0 212.727598566 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.540697674419 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 843.3 618.680645161 136% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 84.9195163849 48.9658058833 173% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.80952381 100.406767564 125% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.5714285714 20.6045352989 119% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.14285714286 5.45110844103 58% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.174476885466 0.236089414692 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0478954211432 0.076458572812 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0391624450772 0.0737576698707 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.116545584734 0.150856017488 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0349640452727 0.0645574589148 54% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.0 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 10.9000537634 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.23 8.01818996416 115% => OK
difficult_words: 144.0 86.8835125448 166% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.