Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television advertising directed toward young children (aged 2 to 5) should not be allowed.

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television advertising directed toward young children (aged 2 to 5) should not be allowed.

In today world, television advertising plays an important role in introduce new things that can be helpful for people’s life. However, some television ads aim children who are not mature enough to understand them in the best way. As far as I am concerned, there are two different opinions toward the question. Some people think that ads can be helpful for young children, while others believe otherwise. I subscribe to the latter one, and there are several reasons to name. Three of which—that is—young children are so impressive, they do not know how to interpret the ads, and they can be frightened, are the most conspicuous ones.

The first important reason that I want to discuss is impressiveness of young children. As everyone knows children on earlier ages are trying to learn different aspects of life. They face a lot of peculiar situation in which they do not know how to handle them because they did not face them before. Therefore, they learn from them according to their own style. Advertisements are example of this kind of conditions. Imagine a situation which children try to cut the meat by knife, because he or she saw it before in television. The aim of the ad was to show high quality of knife. But, children found something similar to knife in the ad in his or her home kitchen, and try to cut something, maybe his or her fingers, using it.

The second reason that comes to mind is children are so knowledge less about their environment. So they can interpret situation inaccurately. It may harm them because of so dangerous situations could happen around them. As a result, ads can be harmful in different manners. For example, children can use washing substances for satisfy their hunger or thirst because they are like foods or drinks. The ad shows a liquid to wash the dishes, children can find something in the kitchen similar to it, and unfortunately, it is like water, he or she do not know about its function. So, they try to drink it, and it will make them sick.

Last but not least, some advertisements show something that is frightening children. It can have bad consequence on their mental health. In some ads, for example, to show microbes, producers use some ugly animation which can frighten children; it may result to nightmare for them, and has bad effects on their attitudes.

All in all, to sum up what I outlined above, it is obvious that ads are one of the most important parts of television programs, but some of them may bring bad subsequences for young children who are in an age which can learn anything in inaccurate way. Besides, they are so impressive which can put them in dangerous situation, or make them scared. Therefore, it is better no to direct advertising toward young children.

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In today world,
In today's world,

The second reason that comes to mind is children are so knowledge less about their environment.
The second reason that comes to mind is that children are less knowledgeable about their environment.

It may harm them because of so dangerous situations could happen around them
It may harm them because of so dangerous situations which could happen around them

children can use washing substances for satisfy their hunger
children can use washing substances to satisfy their hunger
children can use washing substances for satisfying their hunger

he or she do not know about its function.
he or she does not know about its functions.

it is better no to direct advertising toward young children.
it is better not to direct advertising toward young children.

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No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2

Attribute Value Ideal
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Category: Good Excellent
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No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.134 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5