Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Young people should try several different jobs before they take a long term career
There is no doubt that trying jobs play the predominent role in persons' future career. No one can deny the influence of having experience on preparing for future job. A controversial question raised related to the issue that how mane job the people should experience before getting main job? Some people may hold this viewpoint that the young people should try one dominent job before they take a long term career. However, others take the opposite viewpoint and believe that taking several jobs is more beneficial for young people. In my perspective, the second belief is true. From what follow, I will pinpiont some of outstanding reasons.
One of the most important reason coming mind related to the statement is that trying several jobs can cause to release the young persons' stress due to the fact that by doing several thing, they can acquire more and more experience. An empirical research in south Asia clearly demonstrates that people who experience more than one job before taking the main career are more successful. This means that if one take one job even related to his future career, he will not any other choice in the future career. So if his job position depends on some flactuated things he allways will have stress for his future. For example, one of my friends studied in petroleum major in one of the most prestigues university in my country. He had a part time job in the small oil and gas company. According to the fact that job position in his field directly related to the oil price, by declining or enhancing the price of oil the job position flactuates. Consequently, my frient allways had extra stress in comparition with other students who studied on other majors and have experienced several jobs.
Furthermore, the equally important reason supported my idea is that their talents can be flourished. they can perform several jobs before entering the main career and choise the best one fror their future job. From psychological stand point, when a young person do more than one things, his opts are broaden. In this regard, he can test his talents and intrests in several fields and choise the best one for his future work. The most persons who are our legends in all fields like mathematic or physic or philossify and etc had experienced more than one work when thwy were young. Take Albert Ainistain, the most famous scientists in the recent era, as an example. He wrote in his biography book that he experienced more than ten jobs when he was young in order to find his interest and thrieve his talents. Therefore, doing several jobs in younger time has a profound effect on being success in the future.
From what has been mentioned above, if one weighs the merits and demerits of taking several jobs before putting steps to the main long term career, he can safely reach the conclusion that conducting several jobs has more advantages. It is hard to disguise the fact that some probable advantages of having one special job such as concentration of the main future job. Despite of this fact, trying several jobs is more benefical for young people due to the above reasons. All in all, it is anticipated that young people will incline to perform more than one jobs before taking the long term career, if they want to be more success.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 109, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'releasing'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'cause' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: releasing
...t is that trying several jobs can cause to release the young persons stress due to the fac...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 175, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun thing seems to be countable; consider using: 'several things'.
Suggestion: several things
...ns stress due to the fact that by doing several thing, they can acquire more and more experie...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 232, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'empirical research'.
Suggestion: Empirical research
...y can acquire more and more experience. An empirical research in south Asia clearly demonstrates that...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 731, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...gues university in my country. He had a part time job in the small oil and gas company. A...
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Line 3, column 101, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...s that their talents can be flourished. they can perform several jobs before enterin...
^^^^
Line 3, column 275, Rule ID: ONE_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use the numeral 'one' with plural words. Did you mean 'one thing', 'a thing', or simply 'things'?
Suggestion: one thing; a thing; things
...point, when a young person do more than one things, his opts are broaden. In this regard, ...
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Line 3, column 300, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'broadened'.
Suggestion: broadened
...n do more than one things, his opts are broaden. In this regard, he can test his talent...
^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['consequently', 'furthermore', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'second', 'so', 'therefore', 'for example', 'no doubt', 'such as']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.231270358306 0.229887763892 101% => OK
Verbs: 0.153094462541 0.158761421928 96% => OK
Adjectives: 0.130293159609 0.0866891130778 150% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0342019543974 0.046263068375 74% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0537459283388 0.0685040099705 78% => OK
Prepositions: 0.128664495114 0.118717715034 108% => OK
Participles: 0.0521172638436 0.0351676179071 148% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.46434152844 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0211726384365 0.0309702414327 68% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0895765472313 0.0887237588012 101% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0228013029316 0.0209618222197 109% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.014657980456 0.0139019557991 105% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3270.0 2387.08602151 137% => OK
No of words: 567.0 408.028673835 139% => OK
Chars per words: 5.7671957672 5.86048508987 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87972968509 4.48200974243 109% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.342151675485 0.338922669872 101% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.229276895944 0.251872472559 91% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.135802469136 0.174417080927 78% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0881834215168 0.112833075102 78% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46434152844 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 250.0 212.727598566 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.440917107584 0.524397521467 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 52.1965450806 59.2087087015 88% => OK
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6684587814 131% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.5533526081 102% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.5604998453 48.84282405 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.111111111 120.699889404 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0 20.5533526081 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.407407407407 0.644075263715 63% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.5376344086 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.54480286738 126% => OK
Readability: 43.9276895944 45.7405998639 96% => OK
Elegance: 1.70945945946 1.45489161554 117% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.254600755493 0.300154397459 85% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.118768925977 0.103427244359 115% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.078987336669 0.0752933317313 105% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.456841621664 0.497263757937 92% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.12823024508 0.151897553556 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0958137484113 0.114077575197 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0804453844976 0.0781384742642 103% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.484504960288 0.336927656856 144% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.075079679422 0.067059652881 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.201369722831 0.210909579961 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0512692430577 0.0618886996521 83% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8870967742 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.86379928315 155% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.91756272401 142% => OK
Positive topic words: 12.0 8.42114695341 142% => OK
Negative topic words: 6.0 2.4623655914 244% => OK
Neutral topic words: 6.0 2.75985663082 217% => OK
Total topic words: 24.0 13.6433691756 176% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.