Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:
In order to become financially responsible adults, chilren should learn to manage their own money at a young age.
Some of my friends are careless about their money. They can't manage their income and at the end of month they are considered as same as poor people without even a cent. But some others and I are really managers and responsible. If somebody ask us in order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at a young age, we certainly agree with the statement.
The first and most important reason is that based on psychological concepts, the main character of people are usually characterized during childhood. What they see and learn in this time is so important for being adult. I have read about a lot of famous musicians that they started learning playing musical instruments during their childhood. In another example, perfessional athletics have lunch learning and practice so hard even at the age of seven or eight. This idea could be easily understandable for financial issues. I knew an owner a big company who wants his sons be the owner after him. He told me "a councelor advised me if you want your sons to be financially responsible adults, teach them some simple concepts such as saving little money in their pig".
Another reason is that, when kids be responsible during childhood they make self-confidence and good experience about financial concepts. Then when they become adults they can better face financial issues and as a result, make better decisions. For example, my uncle faced almost a bankrupty six months ago, but he could handle it and passed this problem very strongly. When we asked him how he could be self confines about that he told us, when I was child, my parents gave me some money to buy and sell icecreams in the school yards. Sometimes I could not sell and they melted. But my father encouraged me to learn how can sell them wisely and ignore losing money.
All in all, though some parents think it is better that kids just play and play I think it is better for them to learn some important concepts such as manage their own money to become financially responsible adults. I even suggest that some financial concepts put in the school textbooks.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 57, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ds are careless about their money. They cant manage their income and at the end of m...
^^^^
Line 1, column 241, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'somebody' must be used with a third-person verb: 'asks'.
Suggestion: asks
...y managers and responsible. If somebody ask us in order to become financially respo...
^^^
Line 2, column 291, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to play'.
Suggestion: to play
...us musicians that they started learning playing musical instruments during their childh...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, really, so, then, for example, i think, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 57.0 43.0788530466 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 33.0 52.1666666667 63% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1774.0 1977.66487455 90% => OK
No of words: 369.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.80758807588 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38284983912 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6102189843 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.539295392954 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 545.4 618.680645161 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.8926546684 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.3684210526 100.406767564 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.4210526316 20.6045352989 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.45110844103 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.272307373016 0.236089414692 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0820200107124 0.076458572812 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.127863043101 0.0737576698707 173% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.195846166084 0.150856017488 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.136995485055 0.0645574589148 212% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 10.9000537634 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.36 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 86.8835125448 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.