do you agree or disagree with this following topic:the government should force younger people to do national services : military services or social work and why?

Essay topics:

do you agree or disagree with this following topic:
the government should force younger people to do national services : military services or social work and why?

National services are very important to our society because these services serve a huge number of people and we should all try to involve in such as these activities. Some people believe that the government should require younger people to perform national services such as volunteer positions, social works or military services, while others disagree. In my opinion teenagers should do like these services and I feel this way for two important reasons.

The first reason is that could help young adults in their future by making each step in their life easier. Since a lot of students now in order to be accepted at one of the university they should do some volunteer hours.
The universities like to know that their students are aware of the importance of the time. My sister experience is a good example of this. When she was at high school, my dad forced her to do some volunteer hours at a dental office. In one year, she did a round 1500 hours. Then, when she applied for a dental school, they asked her to submit a proof for her volunteer hours and two recommendation letters. In fact, she accepted much more quaikly with her volunteer position.

The second reason is that those kinds of services could help teenagers to be more appreciated for their life.Now younger people waste a lot of their time on un valuable activities in stead of doing things that could help their community. But if the government force them to do some social works, some of teenagers could find that a good way to change their life. My brother had a friend who was always waste his free time by hanging out with friends until the midnight and he had a fight every week. Also, he never studied well. As a result, his parent's went to the school and asked them to help by forcing him to serve kids with cancer in the hospital at his free time.
After a while, he was totally different and he began to change his life. He started to realize that we only had one life and we should appreciate every thing . Therefore, doing some social work could be a way to change our life.

In conclusion, national services have a positive effects on teenager's life. Not only they could have better future but also they could be more satisfied a bout their life. It is not only younger people responsibility but also ours. We should be a part of these activities to build a strong community.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 447, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... In fact, she accepted much more quaikly with her volunteer position. The se...
^^
Line 8, column 110, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Now
...s to be more appreciated for their life.Now younger people waste a lot of their tim...
^^^
Line 8, column 181, Rule ID: IN_STEAD_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'instead of'?
Suggestion: instead of
...of their time on un valuable activities in stead of doing things that could help their comm...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 297, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'some of', you should use 'the' ('some of the teenagers') or simply say ''some teenagers''.
Suggestion: some of the teenagers; some teenagers
...ent force them to do some social works, some of teenagers could find that a good way to change th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 625, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hem to help by forcing him to serve kids with cancer in the hospital at his free ...
^^
Line 9, column 41, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... After a while, he was totally different and he began to change his life. He star...
^^
Line 9, column 85, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... he began to change his life. He started to realize that we only had one life and...
^^
Line 9, column 160, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ife and we should appreciate every thing . Therefore, doing some social work could...
^^
Line 11, column 62, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'teenagers'' or 'teenager's'?
Suggestion: teenagers'; teenager's
...nal services have a positive effects on teenagers life. Not only they could have better f...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 303, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...activities to build a strong community.
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, then, therefore, well, while, as to, i feel, in conclusion, in fact, such as, as a result, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1950.0 1977.66487455 99% => OK
No of words: 423.0 407.700716846 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.60992907801 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53508145475 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.43066911927 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 201.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.475177304965 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 608.4 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.0704429543 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 84.7826086957 100.406767564 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.3913043478 20.6045352989 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 5.45110844103 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 4.53405017921 132% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 10.0 5.5376344086 181% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.238927324941 0.236089414692 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0689162655555 0.076458572812 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0750940574271 0.0737576698707 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125734331425 0.150856017488 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.101500004697 0.0645574589148 157% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.5 11.7677419355 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.46 10.9000537634 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.88 8.01818996416 86% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 86.8835125448 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.