TPO-24 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.Use specific reasons and examples

The majority of people who are in their early to mid-twenties think that encouraging teenage children to take a part-time job is not one of the best ways for parents to help their children prepare for adult life. They support that they have not enough time to take a part-time job with their hard study. However, the notion does not reflect the stance that I hold and should not be thought about in a different light. I believe that encouraging teenage children to take a part-time job is one of the best ways for parents to help their children prepare for adult life. This is because they are able to broaden their perspectives and it contains an educational process.
First of all, by taking a part-time job, teenage children are able to prepare for adult life because it makes them to broaden their perspectives. To be specific, encouraging the children to take a part-time job allows them to better understand other cultures, lifestyle, and perspectives. As modern society is becoming increasingly, globalized today’s world requires people with a strong understanding of international views. People can do this better by having a lot of chances to meet many people at work. To illustrate, Steve Jobs, who is the founder of Apple, made great accomplishments in his lifetime. I read online that he was very successful because he was global minded and culturally sensitive. He did this by taking a lot of part-time job when he was young. Therefore, this proves that it is one of the best ways for parents to help their teenage children prepare for adult life when their parents encourage them to take a part-time job in order to broaden their children perspectives.
Moreover, children’s taking a part-time job contains an educational process. In addition, part-time job creates opportunities for learning how to improve their interpersonal skills, which as a result allows people to obtain valuable information, stay ahead, and attain personal growth. People need to be educated throughout their lives because education is the most powerful weapon that they can use to change the world as well as their own lives. For example, when I was a middle school student, my father forced me to help his job. At that time, I was able to meet a lot of people who are upper class of many companies and share each other’s experience. It was very impressive in my whole life from the beginning. Through this experience, I realized that children’s taking a part-time job is one of the best ways to help themselves to prepare for adult life since contains a learning process. Hence, this shows that parents’ encouraging their children to take a part-time job enables their children to prepare for their adult life since contains learning process.
To sum up, I believe that encouraging teenage children to take a part-time job is one of the best ways for parents to help their children prepare for adult life : helping their children broaden their perspectives and learn an educational process during part-time job. All things I have mentioned, it is my belief that my argument regarding this topic has been effectively and precisely delivered with the reasons.

Votes
Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1077, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to process'
Suggestion: to process
...heir adult life since contains learning process. To sum up, I believe that encouraging...
^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['first', 'hence', 'however', 'if', 'moreover', 'regarding', 'so', 'therefore', 'well', 'for example', 'in addition', 'as a result', 'as well as', 'first of all', 'to sum up']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.226510067114 0.229887763892 99% => OK
Verbs: 0.177852348993 0.158761421928 112% => OK
Adjectives: 0.105704697987 0.0866891130778 122% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0302013422819 0.046263068375 65% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0838926174497 0.0685040099705 122% => OK
Prepositions: 0.107382550336 0.118717715034 90% => OK
Participles: 0.0352348993289 0.0351676179071 100% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.91065199729 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0503355704698 0.0309702414327 163% => OK
Particles: 0.00167785234899 0.00188951952338 89% => OK
Determiners: 0.0771812080537 0.0887237588012 87% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00503355704698 0.0209618222197 24% => Some modal verbs wanted.
WH_determiners: 0.0134228187919 0.0139019557991 97% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3177.0 2387.08602151 133% => OK
No of words: 531.0 408.028673835 130% => OK
Chars per words: 5.98305084746 5.86048508987 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80035803286 4.48200974243 107% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.359698681733 0.338922669872 106% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.273069679849 0.251872472559 108% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.195856873823 0.174417080927 112% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.126177024482 0.112833075102 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91065199729 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 212.0 212.727598566 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.399246704331 0.524397521467 76% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 45.9473691622 59.2087087015 78% => OK
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6684587814 111% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0869565217 20.5533526081 112% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.4661668105 48.84282405 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.130434783 120.699889404 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0869565217 20.5533526081 112% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.652173913043 0.644075263715 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.5376344086 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.54480286738 18% => OK
Readability: 50.3939245067 45.7405998639 110% => OK
Elegance: 1.26436781609 1.45489161554 87% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.552108305244 0.300154397459 184% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.148077215258 0.103427244359 143% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.154943055641 0.0752933317313 206% => Ideas in sentences are similar.
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.471626563721 0.497263757937 95% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.182330372783 0.151897553556 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.216366716423 0.114077575197 190% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.162152296239 0.0781384742642 208% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.582647480095 0.336927656856 173% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0346040253668 0.067059652881 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.453859082534 0.210909579961 215% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0357947293738 0.0618886996521 58% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8870967742 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.86379928315 26% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.91756272401 102% => OK
Positive topic words: 14.0 8.42114695341 166% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 2.4623655914 41% => OK
Neutral topic words: 5.0 2.75985663082 181% => OK
Total topic words: 20.0 13.6433691756 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.