TPO 40 independent Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Essay topics:

TPO 40 independent
Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.
Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

It is very vital for parents that their children be a successful person in their life, so they apply various methods to assist them. I believe that giving money to children as a reward when they achieve high grad is an excellent idea. I will explore the reasons why I feel this way in the following essay.
First of all, in this way, students can be encouraged by their parents to study harder. Consequently, their academic performance will improve. Students are usually occupied with a lot of assignments and projects that sometimes leads them to get bored with studying; therefore, they need something to give them the motivation to put them on track in order to be willing to study again. To be more specific, the same process happens in universities and companies. For example, universities offer scholarships or funding to students who have a strong background in education or skills and also companies give promotions or extra money to hard workers.

Secondly, it gives pupils an opportunity to learn how to control, save, and spend their money from an early age. In other words, they will develop a great skill that will have a considerable impact on their life in the future. For instance, when I was a student at school there was a beautiful watch in a store on my way to school. I always stopped in front of that store and looked at that watch as I did not have enough money. However, there was a way to fulfill my goal. My parents were always giving me money as stimulation when I got top grade, so I gradually saved that money. Ultimately, I purchased that watch.

In conclusion, I am of the opinion that students should receive a monetary incentive when they acquire a high mark at school. This is due to the fact that it stimulates them to focus more on their studies and put more effort into studying hard, and because they learn how to manage their money while they are kids.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...feel this way in the following essay. First of all, in this way, students can ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, however, if, look, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, for example, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, first of all, in other words

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 50.0 43.0788530466 116% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 52.1666666667 84% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1564.0 1977.66487455 79% => OK
No of words: 337.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.6409495549 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28457229495 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60933634465 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 212.727598566 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.548961424332 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 487.8 618.680645161 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.2785327137 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.0 100.406767564 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8235294118 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.64705882353 5.45110844103 177% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.220161368661 0.236089414692 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0657287145683 0.076458572812 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0457072317253 0.0737576698707 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142950755881 0.150856017488 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0431337504138 0.0645574589148 67% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.3 11.7677419355 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 58.1214874552 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 10.1575268817 82% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.63 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 86.8835125448 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.