TPO-44 - Independent Writing Task Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing th

When it comes to the activities that children are able to do in their leisure time, parents in general believe that it is mandatory for children to study in their leisure time. On the other hand, few parents do not control what children are supposed to do in personal time. However, children should have fun playing or sporting with their friends.
Admittedly, in my country, almost all parents expected their children to have successful career in the future through studying hard day after day. Therefore, they motivate children to be diligent via various methods, such as offering extra allowance for every excellent grade they get in school, or regulating their time management by limiting the amount of time they are able to play computers, or even "use" computers. My parents always confine me from using computers until I got admission of an excellent college by changing the passwords of computer every day since I had successfully cracked the passwords one time. At first I opposed to this method all the time; yet through their ways of training the habit of studying, I actually studied while they were too busy to take care of me. In order to convince them into stop controlling me, I argued whenever I finished homework or had excellent performance in school. None of my persuasion worked.
However, this way of accumulating learning habit is too exhausting and too excruciating. To begin with, if my parents allowed me to play computers whenever I finished assignments without locking the computer, I could have a more satisfied childhood. They always said I could play video games after I get into an outstanding university. Nevertheless, this is not how reality works. College schoolwork is much more challenging, which I spent most of my leisure time occupying in assignments and projects. In other words, I miss the opportunity to play video games to the fullest in childhood. Besides, sometimes I cannot communicate with my friends since I do not have any childhood memories related to playing as much computers as possible, or I played only a few computer games compared to them. Therefore, it took me extra efforts to make friends because having the relatively comparable memories do help make new friends. As a result, if my parents did not control my leisure time, I could live more contented.
Accordingly, children should spend their leisure time playing or sporting while parents are too busy to control their activities since people only live once, they are supposed to have satisfied childhood instead of only studying and learning memories.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 712, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...hildhood memories related to playing as much computers as possible, or I played only...
^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['accordingly', 'actually', 'besides', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'nevertheless', 'so', 'therefore', 'while', 'in general', 'such as', 'as a result', 'in other words', 'to begin with', 'on the other hand']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.20964360587 0.229887763892 91% => OK
Verbs: 0.186582809224 0.158761421928 118% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0754716981132 0.0866891130778 87% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0712788259958 0.046263068375 154% => OK
Pronouns: 0.100628930818 0.0685040099705 147% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.115303983229 0.118717715034 97% => OK
Participles: 0.0607966457023 0.0351676179071 173% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.83180817091 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0398322851153 0.0309702414327 129% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0503144654088 0.0887237588012 57% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0125786163522 0.0209618222197 60% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0125786163522 0.0139019557991 90% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2577.0 2387.08602151 108% => OK
No of words: 426.0 408.028673835 104% => OK
Chars per words: 6.04929577465 5.86048508987 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54310108192 4.48200974243 101% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.368544600939 0.338922669872 109% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.330985915493 0.251872472559 131% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.227699530516 0.174417080927 131% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.129107981221 0.112833075102 114% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83180817091 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 215.0 212.727598566 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.504694835681 0.524397521467 96% => OK
Word variations: 56.5798001179 59.2087087015 96% => OK
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6684587814 92% => OK
Sentence length: 22.4210526316 20.5533526081 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.8246221898 48.84282405 135% => OK
Chars per sentence: 135.631578947 120.699889404 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.4210526316 20.5533526081 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.842105263158 0.644075263715 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.5376344086 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.54480286738 18% => OK
Readability: 55.5196441809 45.7405998639 121% => OK
Elegance: 1.07602339181 1.45489161554 74% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.400252703387 0.300154397459 133% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.085983977174 0.103427244359 83% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0712521316448 0.0752933317313 95% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.450524562019 0.497263757937 91% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.208037452024 0.151897553556 137% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.128562949186 0.114077575197 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.08223103093 0.0781384742642 105% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.292806528348 0.336927656856 87% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0503961163702 0.067059652881 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.276064602499 0.210909579961 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0808025911126 0.0618886996521 131% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8870967742 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.86379928315 26% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.91756272401 41% => OK
Positive topic words: 14.0 8.42114695341 166% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 2.4623655914 41% => OK
Neutral topic words: 0.0 2.75985663082 0% => More neutral topic words wanted.
Total topic words: 15.0 13.6433691756 110% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.