What makes you unique?
Inside everyone is a hidden gem, waiting to be discovered one day. Although we can not realise its presence, it is always there, because the gem is what makes each of us special and peculiar. It can be specific talents, characteristics, appearance features or even an individual’s dedication to a belief. For me, I stand out from the crowd because of my determination, and the passion I give for astrophysics.
Our uniqueness varies in different ways, a person can be gifted in a particular field, such as in Mathematics, Music, or simply, someone is special due to their gold-hearted soul. As for myself, I never think I am talented, nor do I ever believe that I am actually good at anything, but once I have set my heart on something, I will do it until the end. Despite there are obstacles or difficulties appear on my road to success, and sometimes I fail to overcome them, I urge myself to get up from the fall and keep going, until I have finally tackled the problems. Perhaps it was the determination that encouraged me to never give up and keep practicing during my 3 years of preparing for IELTS. When I started studying at the beginner’s level, everything seemed so overwhelmed and complex to me. The listening test was too fast to hear properly, the reading passages were too lengthy and difficult to read… The same problem kept happening to me for four months without any witnessed improvements, things began to set me on nerves. However, I told myself to keep practicing, and practicing, until I felt satisfied with my trainings. Hence, I continued to listen to English TV programmes without subtitles, read books and newspapers in English until I was ready to take the test. Now all the hard works are paying off, I’ve got a 7.5 in IELTS!
Staying determined has helped me a lot in studying, as well as developing other life skills, and it is one of the main reasons why I am in love with the universes, the laws of gravity, magnetic field… Undoubtedly, astrophysics is a complicated subject, because it has to deal with matters which belong to outer space, probably the distance between Earth and a neutron star the astrophysicists are researching about can be up to hundred of light years! And for a 14-year-old girl, it is her most ambitious dream, it is even impossible to accomplish. I never know why I am drawn to this field, but I am very into studying about the unveiled mysteries of our cosmic. What will be the ending of our universe? The Big Bounce, or The Big Crunch? Can we create an object whose weight can create hole to the unknown of the fabric of the universe, as in Albert Einstein’s theory? Can we accelerate the speed of light, or it still remains the fastest matter across the observable universe?... There are numerous questions in my head that can not be answered, but the curiosity never stops there. Astrophysics has created such a profound impact on my life, and my career goal, too. Of course, my knowledge of astrophysics is still limited, because what I know is just the tip of an iceberg. That is why I want to dive further into this field, I want to gain more insights of the subject and more knowledge. Astrophysics has certainly broaden my mind, and my sighted perspective about the world, about where we are living in. I am aware that to become a professional astrophysicist is not an easy task, but I am determined to achieve the goal.
Whenever we speak of uniqueness, we always refer to a person’s positive and stand-out traits, but what about negative characteristics and weak points? In spite of the fact that flaws and shortcomings do contribute in creating a negative impression of us on other people, but they also make us the odd one out, the “eccentric” ones among the crowd. As for me, I am considered as “lunatic” and a little bit “crazy”! I always talk to myself out loud when I am alone or I am watching a TV show, sometimes on the streets. The monologues in my mind usually can not help but to burst out from my mouth without my acknowledgement. That habit has caused a little bit problems for me when I was making new friends, but luckily, they’ve gotten used to that over time, but there are still people who use that to mock me. Another thing is I am the one who never realises the real danger although it is very obvious. Recently, I had burnt my whole right foot while I was cooking instant noodles. The first thing you need to do when you are burnt is to wash the burnt area with cold water, but I did not do that for about thirty minutes! When I was burnt, I only cared about cleaning up the evidence before my mom knew what happened.When my parents found out, my conditions had deteriorated severely than they could imagine. Negative marks do separate us from the others, but the most important thing is whether we improve and fix those flaws or not.
All in all, the hidden gem within us is what makes us more confident and proud of who we are. My determination and interest for the science world help me love myself, and use them for better things. Alternatively, no one is perfect, everyone has imperfections, so do I. Therefore, it is our responsibility to change them and correct them. We never want to be another person’s copycat, neither do we want to become a negative figure for the society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 237, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an be specific talents, characteristics, appearance features or even an individua...
^^
Line 5, column 63, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... helped me a lot in studying, as well as developing other life skills, and it is ...
^^
Line 5, column 430, Rule ID: NODT_DOZEN[1]
Message: Use simply: 'a hundred'.
Suggestion: a hundred
...ists are researching about can be up to hundred of light years! And for a 14-year-old g...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1430, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'broadened'.
Suggestion: broadened
...e knowledge. Astrophysics has certainly broaden my mind, and my sighted perspective abo...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 420, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...considered as 'lunatic' and a little bit 'crazy'! I always talk to mys...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 684, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...knowledgement. That habit has caused a little bit problems for me when I was making new f...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 819, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'peopled'.
Suggestion: peopled
... to that over time, but there are still people who use that to mock me. Another thing ...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1260, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: When
...idence before my mom knew what happened.When my parents found out, my conditions had...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, finally, first, hence, however, if, so, still, therefore, well, while, another thing, as for, as to, of course, such as, as well as, in spite of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 41.0 13.1623246493 311% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 7.85571142285 165% => OK
Conjunction : 43.0 10.4138276553 413% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 22.0 7.30460921844 301% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 126.0 24.0651302605 524% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 120.0 41.998997996 286% => Less preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 10.0 8.3376753507 120% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 4410.0 1615.20841683 273% => Less number of characters wanted.
No of words: 946.0 315.596192385 300% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.66173361522 5.12529762239 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.54590957359 4.20363070211 132% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.02058383676 2.80592935109 108% => OK
Unique words: 468.0 176.041082164 266% => Less unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.494714587738 0.561755894193 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1385.1 506.74238477 273% => syllable counts are too long.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 26.0 5.43587174349 478% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 2.52805611222 356% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 14.0 2.10420841683 665% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 23.0 0.809619238477 2841% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 38.0 16.0721442886 236% => Too many sentences.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 96.8611430086 49.4020404114 196% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.052631579 106.682146367 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8947368421 20.7667163134 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.34210526316 7.06120827912 61% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.01903807615 159% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 22.0 8.67935871743 253% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 3.9879759519 251% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 3.4128256513 176% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0942101620065 0.244688304435 39% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0210907539452 0.084324248473 25% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0418501220741 0.0667982634062 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0546313452883 0.151304729494 36% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0279173196344 0.056905535591 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 13.0946893788 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 50.2224549098 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.04 12.4159519038 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.95 8.58950901804 93% => OK
difficult_words: 187.0 78.4519038076 238% => Less difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 9.78957915832 123% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.33 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.