TOEFL integrated writing: fuel-cell engines

The article claims that the fuel cell engine has a lot of advantages and sooner it will replaced the internal combustion energy and gives three reasons to support. Although, the professor states that reducing the usage of the internal combustion energy will decrease the oil consumption and gas pollution, he opposes that the hydrogen based fuel to be the perfect solution. He provides three reasons.

First, the professor says that hydrogen it self not directly found in the same form but first we have to get its purified liquid state form from water. Also, it is not easily to prepare the cool enviroment that required its purificatin as the temprature must be -253 cellsius.

Second, this replacement will not solve the pollution issue. As during the purification procces, we have to burn coal and oil to get the energy needed to the purification procces. So, the factories itself will be responsible for the pollution.

Finally, the readindg states that this replacement will save money. However, the professor refute this by stating that to get energy needed by the engine to work , it undergoes chemical reactions in the presence of component Platinum which is a very rare and expensive elament.

That's why the professor believe that this replacement will not be a good solution.

Votes
Average: 6.5 (2 votes)
Essay Categories

Sentence: The article claims that the fuel cell engine has a lot of advantages and sooner it will replaced the internal combustion energy and gives three reasons to support.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to will and replaced

Sentence: However, the professor refute this by stating that to get energy needed by the engine to work , it undergoes chemical reactions in the presence of component Platinum which is a very rare and expensive elament.
Description: The fragment professor refute this is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace refute with verb, past tense

Sentence: That's why the professor believe that this replacement will not be a good solution.
Description: The fragment professor believe that is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace believe with verb, past tense

Sentence: Also, it is not easily to prepare the cool enviroment that required its purificatin as the temprature must be -253 cellsius.
Error: purificatin Suggestion: purification
Error: cellsius Suggestion: celsius
Error: enviroment Suggestion: environment
Error: temprature Suggestion: temperature

Sentence: As during the purification procces, we have to burn coal and oil to get the energy needed to the purification procces.
Error: procces Suggestion: process

Sentence: Finally, the readindg states that this replacement will save money.
Error: readindg Suggestion: reading

Sentence: However, the professor refute this by stating that to get energy needed by the engine to work , it undergoes chemical reactions in the presence of component Platinum which is a very rare and expensive elament.
Error: elament Suggestion: element

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 out of 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 11 9
No. of Words: 213 250
No. of Characters: 1048 1200
No. of Different Words: 119 120
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.82 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.92 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.607 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 77 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.364 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.147 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.349 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.671 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.113 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4