some parent believe that watching and paying computer games should be limited and subtitled by reading books.do you agree or disagree?
Computers had a significant role in people’s life during the last 50 years. It is used by different groups of people from children to adults for different aims. Children use it for the sake of education and fun while adults use it for their job or surfing The net. It is agreed that watching TV and playing computer games should be limited and pay more attention to children’s reading instead. This will be proven by analyzing how computer games make children anxious and unruly as well as threaten their health.
Today, watching TV and playing computer games are means of entertainment among children and adolescents. Unfortunately, violent is shown in many TV programs which leads to make children rebellious and nervous. Some of computer games are the same and make children aggressive. So, parents should observe their children's activities and devote their time into different parts in order to study, playing games, watching TV and reading books.
Obesity is a contagious disease among people specially children. Imagine a child who spends most of his time in front of TV or playing computer games. This child has no physical activity which cause lots of health problems in the very near future. Thus, it is a good idea to limit the time that is spent for doing sedentary activities.
To sum up, although watching TV or playing games are entertaining and amusing, they should be restricted for children and be replaced by some good habits such as reading, biking, jugging and other physical activities.
This will be proven by analyzing how computer games make children anxious and unruly as well as threaten their health.
Description: as well as == and. can you re-write this sentence?
TV programs which leads to
TV programs which lead to
devote their time into different parts in order to study, playing games, watching TV and reading books.
Description: is 'playing games, watching TV and reading books' parallel to 'study'?
no physical activity which cause lots of health problems
no physical activity which causes lots of health problems
although watching TV or playing games are entertaining and amusing
although watching TV or playing games is entertaining and amusing
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
Still you have grammar issues. Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 252 350
No. of Characters: 1230 1500
No. of Different Words: 141 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.984 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.881 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.578 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 89 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 70 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.211 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.357 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.366 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.558 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5