How do movies or television influence people’s behaviour? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

How do movies or television influence people’s behaviour? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

Technology has been improving since debates. Growth of technology brings new breakthroughs such as radios, televisions and mobile phones. After these products were produced, people found out some entertainmant stuffs. Espacially the movies are some of them. However, after people met television and movies, behaviour of them slightly began to change. They increased their knowlegde. The standarts of life improved. Besides, children became the most affected occupants.

Firstly, when people realized technology’s benefits to life, they started to use it actively. They became familiar to the technology from day to day. The news which existed all over the world, reached them easily and fastly thank to the televisions. Then the knowlegde of people who watch television increased. In addition to that, people accepted the movies as a significant part of their life. While they are watching movies, their dreams and therefore their lifes are shaped according to the movies inherently. Therefore it is well established that, after television and movies, people became more councious and general knowlegde of them were improved.

The second point i would like to make is that, the life standarts of people began to change because of the television and movies. As i mentioned before, while people watch television and movies, they inherently think about their life. They realized that life is not just how they live like. They didn’t only realized that but they found out people who live on the other side of the world as well. That makes their desired life standarts to be developed.

Finally, and actually most importantly, children have been affected quite much from televisions and movies. Since they growth up with technology, television and movies, those became a part of their life. I believe that children feel like that television and movies are a member of thier family. Actually that is why they were affected quite much. Because of the fact that movies are fictions, they think like in a fiction. Therefore this decreased their ration to the life.

On the whole, to my way of thinking, technology, espacially television and movies influenced people’s life significantly. Altough their knowlegde about world and standarts of life improved, their life mind affected badly since their childhood ages.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Technology has been improving since deba...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... became the most affected occupants. Firstly, when people realized technology...
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Line 3, column 536, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...ped according to the movies inherently. Therefore it is well established that, after tele...
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Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ral knowlegde of them were improved. The second point i would like to make is...
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Line 5, column 34, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ed. The second point i would like to make is that, the life st...
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Line 5, column 150, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ecause of the television and movies. As i mentioned before, while people watch te...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...red life standarts to be developed. Finally, and actually most importantly, ...
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Line 7, column 365, Rule ID: BECAUSE_OF_THE_FACT_THAT[1]
Message: This phrase is redundant. Use simply 'because'.
Suggestion: Because
...t is why they were affected quite much. Because of the fact that movies are fictions, they think like in...
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Line 7, column 441, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...fictions, they think like in a fiction. Therefore this decreased their ration to the life...
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Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... decreased their ration to the life. On the whole, to my way of thinking, tec...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, second, so, then, therefore, well, while, in addition, such as, on the whole

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 9.8082437276 10% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 43.0788530466 107% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalization wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1971.0 1977.66487455 100% => OK
No of words: 366.0 407.700716846 90% => OK
Chars per words: 5.38524590164 4.8611393121 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37391431897 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75353586285 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 177.0 212.727598566 83% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.483606557377 0.524837075471 92% => OK
syllable_count: 602.1 618.680645161 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Interrogative: 1.0 0.994623655914 101% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 3.51792114695 256% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.6003584229 136% => OK
Sentence length: 13.0 20.1344086022 65% => OK
Sentence length SD: 31.4286323051 48.9658058833 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 70.3928571429 100.406767564 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 13.0714285714 20.6045352989 63% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.92857142857 5.45110844103 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.5376344086 181% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159721730395 0.236089414692 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0510790882507 0.076458572812 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0527995214555 0.0737576698707 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.105206274676 0.150856017488 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0193022590928 0.0645574589148 30% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 11.7677419355 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.28 58.1214874552 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 10.1575268817 83% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.09 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.78 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 4.0 10.002688172 40% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.2 10.0537634409 72% => Gunning_fog is low.
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => The average readability is low. Need to improve the language.
What are above readability scores?

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Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.