Age discrimination occurs when a decision is made on the basis of a person’s age. In the workplace, these are most often decisions about being employed in the first place, winning promotions or being unfairly dismissed. Should discrimination against older workers be made illegal?
With the advent of urbanisation and constant change in technological growth, modern companies brought many new concepts into work culture. In this occasion, the modern work style appeared as a problem to the old generations and also slowed down the work pace. So the discrimination of older generation on any basis sparked the heated debate. I believe that ill-treating the older generations on any kind of concerns should be considered as severe act under the legal governance.
To begin with, with ever changing technologies the work requirement is upgrading in a rapid phase, the work institutions surprisingly dismissing the older employees to hire the younger generations trained with modern skills. It is a company’s duty to train their employees with the required knowledge and provide rightful time for the workers to cope up with the upgrades. For example, many it companies are hiring recent graduates for low salary rather than training its older staff. Therefore, it is clearly evident that modern firms are playing ruthless and smart strategies to make up with profits.
Furthermore, hiring an inexperienced management staff would lead to brain drain, as they replace the knowledge generations. Though the older generations lack the modern software grip, but had gained a immacuble knowledge over the years, that should be preserved for the companies own benefit. For instance, recent actions of firing the senior mechanics of an aircraft manufacturing company caused huge treat to the lives of travellers on the aeroplane. Seen in the light it is evident that discrimination of the seniors leads to great loss.
To conclude, it might be important to survive with the modern consequences that generate major profits, but the solution should never take the place of discriminating the older generations.
Comments
Hello, Thank you for the
Hello, Thank you for the marking.
I am keen to know how can I increase that .5 mark for 7.
if I consider these (Sentence Length SD: 5.48, No. of Grammatical Errors - 32, No. of Spelling Errors- 12)
as my major mistakes for the loss, would I be able to achieve 7 if I just avoid spelling mistakes and make varied sentence length. To what range can I make grammatical errors to score 7. Please provide me some feed back.
Thank You,
SJ
First of all, try to remove
First of all, try to remove grammar issues which are the biggest ones in the flaws.
second, to make sure you can get 7.0, better to have 5 paragraphs, try this pattern:
paragraph 1: introduction. Your ideas/opinions here.
paragraph 2: Admittedly, there are some advantages of side A. First, ... Second, ...
paragraph 3: However, still I support side B. reason 1 + why reason 1 + example for reason 1 + a small conclusion for reason 1.
paragraph 4: In addition, reason 2 + why reason 2 + example for reason 2+ a small conclusion for reason 2.
paragraph 5: conclusion.
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http://www.testbig.com/ielts-essays/some-people-prefer-spend-their-live…
the work institutions surprisingly dismissing the older employees to hire the younger generations trained with modern skills.
Description: what is the verb for this sentence? can you re-write this sentence?
many it companies are hiring
many of companies are hiring
it is evident that discrimination of the seniors leads to great loss.
it is evident that the discrimination of the seniors leads to the great loss.
Sentence: Though the older generations lack the modern software grip, but had gained a immacuble knowledge over the years, that should be preserved for the companies own benefit.
Error: immacuble Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
Sentence Length SD: 5.484 7.5 //"Sentence Length SD is low" means that the essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentences varieties wanted.
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 287 350
No. of Characters: 1500 1500
No. of Different Words: 172 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.116 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.226 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.927 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 111 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 83 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.077 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.484 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.769 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.036 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5