The following appeared in a magazine article about planning for retirement.
"Because of its spectacular natural beauty and consistent climate, Clearview should be a top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire. As a bonus, housing costs in Clearview have fallen significantly during the past year, and real estate taxes remain lower than those in neighboring towns. Nevertheless, Clearview's mayor promises many new programs to improve schools, streets, and public services. Retirees in Clearview can also expect excellent health care as they grow older, since the number of physicians in the area is far greater than the national average."
The author’s argument that Clearville is the top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire is flawed for various reasons. The author not only draws a strong conclusion without analysing the reason for the fall of house costs, but also bases his conclusion on various vague and unwarranted statements. Furthermore, the author does not consider the demand for the healthcare but only considers the large number of physicians to conclude that Clearville is the top choice which is flawed.
First, the author does not analyse the reason for the fall of house costs while concluding that Clearville is the top choice. The underlying assumption is that the reason would not provide any extra information in analysing the situation which is incorrect. For example, if the house costs have dropped because of the increase in the crime rate, it is incorrect to conclude that Clearville is the top choice for retirement because the retiring people would not prefer a city with higher crime rate. If the author had provided any information on the reason for the fall of house costs, it would have been easy to conclude whether Clearville is the best choice.
Second, the author bases his conclusion on various vague and unwarranted statements. The author describes the spectacular natural beauty and consistent climate of Clearville without comparing them with that of other places which plays a key role in deciding if the Clearville is the best choice. The assumption is that comparision would not provide any valuable information in concluding which is wrong. For example, if there are many other places with better climate and beauty, the author’s conclusion that Clearville is the best choice available is flawed. Also, when quoting the real estate taxes are lower than that of neighboring towns, the author does not provide any information on the comparision of all the taxes of Clearville with the neighboring towns and also he restricts his comparision to the neighboring towns which is incorrect. The assumption here is that real estate taxes are the only measure of comparing taxes and the comparision can be restricted to neighboring towns. The assumption is unwarranted because the author does not provide any information that can support that only real estate taxes are the only measure of comparing taxes and the neighboring towns would provide the sample of towns that represent the whole list of seeking places for retirement. If the author had provided any information regarding the sample of towns, the overall taxes comparision and comparative measure of climate and natural beauty, it would have been easy make a firm conclusion that Clearville is the best choice for retirement.
Third, the conclusion is based on the perception that health care is better in Clearville because the number of physicians in the area is far greater than the national average without considering the demand for the same. While doing so, the author does not provide any information on the demand for the health care. The assumption here is that the demand does not provide any role while concluding which is flawed. For example, if the demand for the health care is higher in Clearville, although the supply is greater than the national average, it is challenging to conclude that Clear ville has excellent health care facilities. Because the author does not provide any information on the demand of the healthcare, it is difficult to conclude that large supply of health care can be helpful in justifying the author’s conclusion.
In conclusion, Because the argument makes several unwarranted assumptions, the author fails to make a convincing case that Clearville is the top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire is flawed for various reasons.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 613 350
No. of Characters: 3084 1500
No. of Different Words: 175 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.976 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.031 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.688 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 227 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 159 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 110 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 90 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.19 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.046 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.423 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.604 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.189 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 73, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'anyone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'seeks'.
Suggestion: seeks
...Clearville is the top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire is flawed for various...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 266, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... costs, but also bases his conclusion on various vague and unwarranted statements...
^^
Line 7, column 564, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'concluding'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'challenge' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: concluding
...the national average, it is challenging to conclude that Clear ville has excellent health c...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 164, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'anyone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'seeks'.
Suggestion: seeks
...Clearville is the top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire is flawed for various...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, regarding, second, so, third, while, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 38.0 19.6327345309 194% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 13.6137724551 191% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3157.0 2260.96107784 140% => OK
No of words: 613.0 441.139720559 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.15008156607 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.97582523872 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79377585065 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 204.123752495 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.300163132137 0.468620217663 64% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 981.9 705.55239521 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 17.0 8.76447105788 194% => OK
Subordination: 10.0 2.70958083832 369% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 29.0 22.8473053892 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 60.6320825397 57.8364921388 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 150.333333333 119.503703932 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.1904761905 23.324526521 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.66666666667 5.70786347227 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193572080746 0.218282227539 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0770111223631 0.0743258471296 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0660818301155 0.0701772020484 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.144425334327 0.128457276422 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0480576022574 0.0628817314937 76% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.4 14.3799401198 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.04 48.3550499002 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.18 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.44 8.32208582834 89% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 98.500998004 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.1389221557 122% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.