"A recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys provides clues as to the effects of birth order on an individual's levels of stimulation. The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence). The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring."
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
As per the main conclusion of the author, firstborn (either humans or any other prime) produce higher levels of hormone cortisol in stimulating situations as compared to their younger siblings. The author came to this conclusion by taking reference from a recent study on rheses monkeys that showed that firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. The same effects could be found to occur in firstborn humans and first time mother monkeys also have found to be producing higher levels of cortisol than they do in subsequent pregnancy's. However, before this argument can be properly evaluated, there are some questions regarding the accuracy of the assumptions which need to be answered.
The cortisol activity of the monkey being studied was purely attributed to the fact it was a firstborn. No evidence is provided which can show that the monkey being studied was not suffering from any other health related issue which could be responsible for shooting up the cortisol levels. For example, mental and stress related disorders have been widespread among primates and as a result the higher cortisol levels could have developed due to enhanced levels of anxiety which can stimulate hormonal levels.
It has been stated in the prompt that firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence). No evidence has been provided to corroborate this argument. The increased levels of the cortisol can also be a result of attainment of maturity level i.e. before their siblings or it might be a result of emotional instability of the firstborn which is a mere psychological phenomenon and hence the cortisol rush could not be attributed to endocrine irregularities or abnormalities which are deemed to be present in humans as well as primates.
The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had several offspring. The increased levels of cortisol could also be attributed to the fact that first time mothers do not have enough experience to handle such a situation of pregnancy and may follow a inaccurate health and eating regime which could lead to such physiological abnormalities. Its important to understand the conditions under which these mothers were analyzed and hence more evidence must be provided to depict ideal conditions for conducting scientific study.
The agency which conducted the study is also not mentioned. This creates an unnecessary skeptism over the credulity of the facts stated above. Only agencies which are recognized by government or government organization themselves must be trusted with their research related results and conclusions.
In conclusion, the argument, as it stands now, is flawed due to its reliance on some unwarranted assumptions. Hence more evidence is expected before a proper evaluation could be made. The testing conditions, state of the objects under study and credibility of the organization conducting the study must be properly analyzed before coming to conclusions. This can bolster trust and credibility in the evaluation and as a result a recommendation could be made or merely accepted.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 529 350
No. of Characters: 2749 1500
No. of Different Words: 232 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.796 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.197 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.824 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 219 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 155 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 124 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 79 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.842 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.748 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.579 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.335 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.598 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 143, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...an did those who had several offspring. The increased levels of cortisol could also...
^^^
Line 7, column 217, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ould also be attributed to the fact that first time mothers do not have enough ex...
^^
Line 7, column 323, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...a situation of pregnancy and may follow a inaccurate health and eating regime whi...
^
Line 11, column 111, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...liance on some unwarranted assumptions. Hence more evidence is expected before a prop...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, may, regarding, so, well, for example, in conclusion, such as, as a result, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 67.0 55.5748502994 121% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2801.0 2260.96107784 124% => OK
No of words: 529.0 441.139720559 120% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29489603025 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79583152331 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88666077282 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 240.0 204.123752495 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.453686200378 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 891.9 705.55239521 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 78.0432412192 57.8364921388 135% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.05 119.503703932 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.45 23.324526521 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.2 5.70786347227 109% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193233122189 0.218282227539 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0671281265539 0.0743258471296 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0572411538855 0.0701772020484 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106883389808 0.128457276422 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0432036175988 0.0628817314937 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.7 14.3799401198 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.78 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 98.500998004 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 17.5 12.3882235529 141% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.