technology has made children less creative than children in the past. Do you agree or disagree
I strongley believe that technology can make the children smarter and most creative. i have plenty of reasons for this clame and i will describe it.
first of all, nowadays because of the technology there are many advanced toys for chidren. Most of these toys create for educational reasons. child can play with them and alongside playing they can learn about the structure of the toys and also they can learn the matter that toy creates because of that. the technology that utilized in manufacturing the toys and other tools that related to chidren can taught most of the sciences to children in an easy and fun way. for example, i have a child and she is very interested in mountain eruption. she always ask questions about the process of eruption, volcanoes, magma and these kind of things. finally, i bought a toy that thaught the children in a scientific method. i think manufacturing this kind of technology is due to technology and developments of material that now utilized in manufacturing toys.
additionally, most of the child have curious characteristics and they have a lot of questions about their around world. perhaps parents cannot answer to all these question correctly and also some parents do not know the answers, but fortunatley todays there are easy accessible to the internet and it is because of the technology. the internet is one of the results of technology. parents can use the internet and websites to find the answers of the child's question. also, todays most of the child have their personal computers and they do not need to anyone to find their answers. they use their computers to find the answers. technology is envolved in all aspects of the lives. people can use it properly. they can use technology in schools for teaching child.
in anutshel, i want to say that technology has made the children creative. children can taught science in attractive ways. the technology is a something that widen children's knowledge about their answers.
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- TOEFL TPO 01 - Integrated Writing Task 60
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: I
...the children smarter and most creative. i have plenty of reasons for this clame a...
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Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ve plenty of reasons for this clame and i will describe it. first of all, nowada...
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Suggestion: First
...for this clame and i will describe it. first of all, nowadays because of the techno...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
.... first of all, nowadays because of the technology there are many advanced toys ...
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Suggestion: Child
...se toys create for educational reasons. child can play with them and alongside playin...
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Suggestion: The
...atter that toy creates because of that. the technology that utilized in manufacturi...
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Suggestion: For
...ces to children in an easy and fun way. for example, i have a child and she is very...
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Suggestion: She
...s very interested in mountain eruption. she always ask questions about the process ...
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Line 2, column 557, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'asks'.
Suggestion: asks
...rested in mountain eruption. she always ask questions about the process of eruption...
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Line 2, column 623, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this kind' or 'these kinds'?
Suggestion: this kind; these kinds
...ocess of eruption, volcanoes, magma and these kind of things. finally, i bought a toy that...
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Suggestion: Finally
...canoes, magma and these kind of things. finally, i bought a toy that thaught the childr...
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Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...agma and these kind of things. finally, i bought a toy that thaught the children ...
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Suggestion: I
...ht the children in a scientific method. i think manufacturing this kind of techno...
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Line 2, column 719, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...ht the children in a scientific method. i think manufacturing this kind of techno...
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Suggestion: Additionally
...now utilized in manufacturing toys. additionally, most of the child have curious charact...
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... of questions about their around world. perhaps parents cannot answer to all these ques...
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...et and it is because of the technology. the internet is one of the results of techn...
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Suggestion: Parents
...et is one of the results of technology. parents can use the internet and websites to fi...
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Suggestion: Also
...ind the answers of the childs question. also, todays most of the child have their pe...
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...t need to anyone to find their answers. they use their computers to find the answers...
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Suggestion: Technology
...se their computers to find the answers. technology is envolved in all aspects of the lives...
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...s envolved in all aspects of the lives. people can use it properly. they can use techn...
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... the lives. people can use it properly. they can use technology in schools for teach...
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...hnology in schools for teaching child. in anutshel, i want to say that technology...
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...hools for teaching child. in anutshel, i want to say that technology has made th...
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Suggestion: Children
...hnology has made the children creative. children can taught science in attractive ways. ...
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Suggestion: The
... can taught science in attractive ways. the technology is a something that widen ch...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, so, for example, i think, kind of, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 52.1666666667 86% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1646.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 334.0 407.700716846 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.92814371257 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.27500489853 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76252408434 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 154.0 212.727598566 72% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.461077844311 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 504.0 618.680645161 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.6607274741 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 74.8181818182 100.406767564 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.1818181818 20.6045352989 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.54545454545 5.45110844103 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 27.0 5.5376344086 488% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.14816484981 0.236089414692 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0559489127415 0.076458572812 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0703228744573 0.0737576698707 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.132273012878 0.150856017488 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0953279841448 0.0645574589148 148% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.4 11.7677419355 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.72 10.9000537634 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.17 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 86.8835125448 68% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.