Human kind needs incentive to improve himself and children need more attention and encouragment to do this. In these days, many parents try to use this need to make their child get better grades in school. While some parents offer personal or mental complement to achieve this, others prefer to give cash money for every high score their child gets. Athough I am completely agree with the whole idea of giving incentive to the students, I believe giving money to students is not a productive way because it makes the child's personality conditional and parents can not continue this practice all the time.
While paying money may improve the student's score, it damages the child's personality. In other words, student become dependent on geting money for his grades otherwise he won't study to get good grades. For example, my uncle's student who are used to getting money for his good grades, suddenly his grades and performance in classes decrease. When my uncle searched for the reason he findout that the reason was that his parents stoped paying him money for getting good grades.
Another problem with this approach is that parents cannot continue this way in the long term. For example, how can a father or mother give his child money when he is going to get a doctorate. As an example, consider a child who used to to this approach he goes to auniversity and gets good grade, but he expects his professor to give him money because of his experience with his parents.
In summary, even though offering an ncentive is a good way to encourage students, giving them cash is not productive and can damage child's personality. Additionally, parents cannot countinue thhis approach for a long time that eventually results in low performance.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 192, Rule ID: LOOSE_LOSE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'lose' (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
Suggestion: lose
...sh might be effective at first, it will loose its leverage in the long term. Meanwhil...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 381, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'investigates'.
Suggestion: investigates
...performance succumbed suddenly. When he investigate the reason, my uncle finds out that his...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 69, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'change'
Suggestion: change
...ng run, this kind of encouragement will changes the students personality. As a result, ...
^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 81, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
... kind of encouragement will changes the students personality. As a result, a student bec...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 196, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'gets'.
Suggestion: gets
...ho wont get good grade unless he or she get money or he ask for more money each tim...
^^^
Line 6, column 212, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'asks'.
Suggestion: asks
... grade unless he or she get money or he ask for more money each time because the sa...
^^^
Line 6, column 355, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'reaches'.
Suggestion: reaches
...le, a secondary school student, when he reach college he probably demand more money f...
^^^^^
Line 6, column 381, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'demands'.
Suggestion: demands
...dent, when he reach college he probably demand more money from his parents because he ...
^^^^^^
Line 6, column 468, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...eeds more money to buy more things. For this reasons, he become a greedy and dependa...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, briefly, first, however, if, second, so, while, for example, for instance, in short, kind of, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 15.1003584229 33% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 30.0 52.1666666667 58% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1413.0 1977.66487455 71% => OK
No of words: 286.0 407.700716846 70% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.94055944056 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11236361783 4.48103885553 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71594608697 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 166.0 212.727598566 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.58041958042 0.524837075471 111% => OK
syllable_count: 443.7 618.680645161 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.5498400571 48.9658058833 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.2 100.406767564 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0666666667 20.6045352989 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.66666666667 5.45110844103 159% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.5376344086 163% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.181528591132 0.236089414692 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0599753239471 0.076458572812 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0439663228441 0.0737576698707 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103315948176 0.150856017488 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0418764364675 0.0645574589148 65% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 11.7677419355 97% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 64.0 86.8835125448 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.