“What recent news story has affected you the most? In what ways has it affected you? Use reasons and examples to support your response."

any kind of war is devastation and unfortunate, but civil war is cancer among wars same as cancer in diseases which is ending to death of a human being.in the same way, a civil war which is destroying a country.in my opinion the most in the recent news which affected me the most is the civil war in Syria. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

first of all, the result of civil war is deterioration of the economy in a country, when economics goes down a lot of misfortunate comes up like poverty, crimes, and diseases.my friend experience is compelling of this example. He was born and raised in a country where civil war was going, he is from South Sudan. he told me that we had a bad economic situation plus a lot of crimes was going in my country. for example, every person has a gun and nobody can differentiate between good guys and bad guys once I have been injured by burglars. moreover, nobody can argue with gunmen, because the result of arguing was death or injury of unarmed men.

secondly, the young generation is the victims of war. Because both opposition group is hiring young men. consequently, the young generation might lose their opportunity to study and persuade their dreams. Moreover, a lot of youths will lose their life or becomes disable in some cases, which makes them be dependent on the other person for their whole life. to be more specific one of my friend he is from Syria he lost his right leg because of this civil war.

in conclusion, I strongly believe that war is in Syria has affected a lot of people around the world, especially it affected me the most for two reasons, first war is destroying the economy of a country. Furthermore, the victim of war is the young generation and destroy their future too.

Votes
Average: 0.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Any
any kind of war is devastation and unfortun...
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Suggestion: First
...will explore in the following essay. first of all, the result of civil war is dete...
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Suggestion: He
... war was going, he is from South Sudan. he told me that we had a bad economic situ...
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Line 3, column 409, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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Suggestion: For
... lot of crimes was going in my country. for example, every person has a gun and nob...
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Suggestion: Moreover
...s once I have been injured by burglars. moreover, nobody can argue with gunmen, because ...
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Suggestion: Secondly
... was death or injury of unarmed men. secondly, the young generation is the victims of...
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Line 5, column 55, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...young generation is the victims of war. Because both opposition group is hiring young m...
^^^^^^^
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Suggestion: Consequently
...h opposition group is hiring young men. consequently, the young generation might lose their ...
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Suggestion: To
... the other person for their whole life. to be more specific one of my friend he is...
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Suggestion: In
...right leg because of this civil war. in conclusion, I strongly believe that war...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, furthermore, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, for example, i feel, in conclusion, kind of, first of all, in my opinion, in some cases, in the same way

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 52.1666666667 82% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1477.0 1977.66487455 75% => OK
No of words: 325.0 407.700716846 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.54461538462 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24591054749 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58828676973 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 212.727598566 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.523076923077 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 465.3 618.680645161 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.8400504944 48.9658058833 143% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.5 100.406767564 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2142857143 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.7857142857 5.45110844103 235% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.5376344086 181% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 11.8709677419 8% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 3.85842293907 285% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0554945007816 0.236089414692 24% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0156816370513 0.076458572812 21% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0335475561227 0.0737576698707 45% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0423844362276 0.150856017488 28% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0424194743301 0.0645574589148 66% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 65.05 58.1214874552 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.35 10.9000537634 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 67.0 86.8835125448 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 10.002688172 190% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.