The following appeared in a health newsletter."A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets,

In this newsletter, due to nation-wide study, the author claims that to decrease the bicycle related accidents the government should pay more attention on educating people about bicycle safety rather than making the use of helmets mandatory, this argument seems acceptable. However, unwarranted evidence and flawed assumptions render the argument highly suspect.

First, the study suggests that there is 45 percent increase in number of bicyclists wearing helmets and 200 percent increase in bicycle related accidents. Author thinks there is a direct correlation between these two events, however he fails to consider the increase in population over the period of ten years. The increase in population might have caused the rise number of cars on the roads too. Accidents could’ve been caused due to the poor driving skills of the cars drivers’.

Second, the increase in population is substantial, hence the increase in accidents might still be limited to normal level or maybe even reduced relatively. With higher population the roads tend to get more crowded and increase the number of bicyclist and vehicles on the roads thereby increasing the possibility of accident occurrence. Plus it isn’t necessary that all the bicyclists that have been in the accident were wearing the helmet.

Finally, the improper roads that may have been left unrepaired by the government can cause the accidents. Also the author has made and unfair remark by saying the increased bicycle accidents are caused by helmet wearing bicyclists because they feel more safer and take more risks. This a baseless remark because it’s a common sense that helmet, although it might not completely protect people from the crash but plays and vital role in protection of the rider.

Hence, the argument makes a number of unstated assumptions that seriously undermine its validity. The rash recommendation to the government to launch the education program of bicycle safety and discourage people to wear helmets can cause severe problems in a long run.

Votes
Average: 5 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 107, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...the government can cause the accidents. Also the author has made and unfair remark b...
^^^^
Line 7, column 250, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'safer' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: safer
...et wearing bicyclists because they feel more safer and take more risks. This a baseless re...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 270, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...an cause severe problems in a long run.
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, hence, however, may, second, so, still

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.6327345309 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 55.5748502994 72% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1735.0 2260.96107784 77% => OK
No of words: 321.0 441.139720559 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.40498442368 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23278547379 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75476790805 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 177.0 204.123752495 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.551401869159 0.468620217663 118% => OK
syllable_count: 536.4 705.55239521 76% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.3624110719 57.8364921388 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.928571429 119.503703932 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.9285714286 23.324526521 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.64285714286 5.70786347227 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.157236087516 0.218282227539 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0568732183584 0.0743258471296 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0640245591285 0.0701772020484 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0874856019767 0.128457276422 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0291378466684 0.0628817314937 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 48.3550499002 84% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.34 12.5979740519 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.66 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

argument 1 -- OK

argument 2 -- duplicated to argument 1

argument 3 -- OK, but not exactly
----------------

Need to argue against the conclusion always. For this topic it is:

Thus, to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety and less on encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets.

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 323 350
No. of Characters: 1668 1500
No. of Different Words: 179 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.239 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.164 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.602 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 135 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.071 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.905 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.346 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.614 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5