Humans arrived in the Kaliko Islands about 7,000 years ago, and within 3,000 years most of the large mammal species that had lived in the forests of the Kaliko Islands were extinct. Previous archaeological findings have suggested that early humans general

Essay topics: Humans arrived in the Kaliko Islands about 7,000 years ago, and within 3,000 years most of the large mammal species that had lived in the forests of the Kaliko Islands were extinct. Previous archaeological findings have suggested that early humans generally relied on both fishing and hunting for food; since archaeologists have discovered numerous sites in the Kaliko Islands where the bones of fish were discarded, it is likely that the humans also hunted the mammals. Furthermore, researchers have uncovered simple tools, such as stone knives, that could be used for hunting. The only clear explanation is that humans caused the extinction of the various mammal species through excessive hunting.

Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.

orlando23's picture

In the argument, we are informed that humans arrived in the Kaliko Islands around 7,000 years ago and that these inhabitants witnessed the ensuing extinction of large mammals species in the forests of the Islands within the subsequent 3000 years. Referring to archaeological discoveries, such as fish bones, as well as simple tools like stone knives, the author ascribes the extinction of the various mammal species to excessive human hunting. Reasonable though this explanation might appear, we cannot safely claim that it is the only one that can reasonably account for the facts presented in the argument. Therefore, we must thoroughly consider the following explanations, which rival the proposed one in the argument.

To begin with, the writer attributes the discovery of fish bones to human fishing in the Kaliko Islands. While human fishing might well have resulted in the fish bone remains, the latter could have also sprung from other factors. First of all, it is likely that the unearthed fish bones trace back to a period when human habitation was scarce, or non-existent. If this is the case, then human behaviors had little to do with the fish bone remains and the subsequent mammal extinction. Consequently, the fish bones can be explained as stemming from the fish’s natural death and eventual deposit on the sites later discovered. Second, even if human occupancy in the Kaliko Islands does correspond with the fish habitation, the fish bones cannot be exclusively attributed to human fishing. Instead, it is of equal likelihood that other animals also caught and ate fish and thus contributed to the disappearance of various mammals in the Kaliko Islands. Once the assertion that Kaliko people relied on fishing proves unwarranted, the underlying logic would be weakened, namely: if Kaliko relied on fishing, they must also have had a dependence on hunting the mammals.

In addition, the uncovered simple tools, including stone knives, lend great support to the arguer’s explanation that the annihilation of mammal species arises from human hunting. However, those tools might not have necessarily been used for the stated purpose, but presumably for other reasons as well. For instance, humans living in the Kaliko Islands could have used those tools to document what they had passed through day in and day out or those tools could have been made for aesthetic purposes. Moreover, people could also have used those tools to protect themselves from animal attacks. Without further examination, we cannot decide which explanation finally led to the discovery of such tools. It is even likely that all the aforementioned factors might have conspired to the finding of those tools.

Finally, even if we admit that the uncovered fish bones and those simple tools were used by humans to hunt mammals on the Kaliko Islands, it is reckless to claim that human hunting has reached such an excessive degree that it directly contributed to the extermination of mammals. Other explanations could readily rival the alleged one in the argument. Considerable climate change, which went beyond mammals’ adaptation abilities, the vanishing of food resources on which those mammals relied, or attack by other animals are all possible factors that could have triggered or accelerated the mammal extinction in the the Kaliko Islands.

To draw a conclusion, although human behavior could have exerted negative influence on nature, in the absence of sufficient information, we cannot establish a causal relationship between it and waning of other animal species. The extinction of mammals in the Kaliko Islands is such a case which requires more considerations of alternative explanations that could account for the facts presented in the argument.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 168, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'mammals'' or 'mammal's'?
Suggestion: mammals'; mammal's
...tnessed the ensuing extinction of large mammals species in the forests of the Islands w...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 617, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...or accelerated the mammal extinction in the the Kaliko Islands. To draw a conclus...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 617, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...or accelerated the mammal extinction in the the Kaliko Islands. To draw a conclus...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, finally, first, however, if, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, thus, well, while, for instance, in addition, such as, as well as, first of all, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.6327345309 81% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 13.6137724551 147% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 74.0 55.5748502994 133% => OK
Nominalization: 28.0 16.3942115768 171% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3182.0 2260.96107784 141% => OK
No of words: 598.0 441.139720559 136% => OK
Chars per words: 5.32107023411 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.94510247834 4.56307096286 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8067056218 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 275.0 204.123752495 135% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.459866220736 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 992.7 705.55239521 141% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.0280552706 57.8364921388 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.347826087 119.503703932 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 23.324526521 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.13043478261 5.70786347227 142% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.282194003656 0.218282227539 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.083224681902 0.0743258471296 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0927899323249 0.0701772020484 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.162382812394 0.128457276422 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0575172337451 0.0628817314937 91% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.6 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.87 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.02 8.32208582834 108% => OK
difficult_words: 155.0 98.500998004 157% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Out of topic.
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samples:
https://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/humans-arrived-kali...

read this:
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 598 350
No. of Characters: 3083 1500
No. of Different Words: 259 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.945 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.156 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.665 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 233 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 169 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 103 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 77 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.26 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.696 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.35 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.545 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.16 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

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