A recently issued twenty-year study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia investigated the possible therapeutic effect of consuming salicylates. Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, food-processing companies also add salicylates to foods as preservatives. The twenty-year study found a correlation between the rise in the commercial use of salicylates and a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by study participants. At the time when the study concluded, food-processing companies had just discovered that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods, and, as a result, many companies plan to do so. Based on these study results, some health experts predict that residents of Mentia will suffer even fewer headaches in the future.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
The reading passage suggests that residents of Mentia are prospected to suffer from fewer headaches in the future, which can be attributed to increase in Salicylate consumption. Several evidences are stated to corroborate the given claim, including the results of a recently issued twenty-year study. Upon closer analysis, however, the argument is rife with holes and assumptions. There are some questions requiring an answer for the claim to gain persuasive logic.
First of all, does Salicylate produce the exact same effect as Aspirin? According to the passage, they are derived from a chemical family identical to Aspirin. But compounds from same chemical families can produce a variety of results based on specific structural differences. Consider Methanol and Ethanol; both are alcohol molecules containing Hydroxyl (-OH) group, and while Ethanol is edible, consumption of Methanol is obnoxious and can cause death. Applying this example, there has to be additional proof that Aspirin and Salicylates yield equivalent effects.
Not only that, are the average decline in number of headaches solely because of increases in Salicylate usage? It is possible that other factors could've come into play. Perhaps the residents' intake of Aspirin coincided during the time span of the study. Under such circumstances, we cannot conclude that Salicylates were salubrious, because the reduced occurrences of headache could be explained by more dosages of Aspirin.
Furthermore, will the residents of Mentia indubitably eat more food containing Salicylates as flavor additives? If this substance has a odious smell, people would develop an aversion to it. This, consequentially will lead to a stagnant, or even declining purchases of processed foods with Salicylates. Therefore, a concrete supporting detail which guarantees that people will definitely fall for such foods is a requisite.
At first glance, the predictions of health experts stated in the passage might seem plausible. Still, for the argument to hold water, the questions addressed above must be resolved. Otherwise, it is open to skepticism and doubt.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 323 350
No. of Characters: 1743 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.239 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.396 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.852 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 82 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 60 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.15 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.693 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.25 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.508 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.033 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 182, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'residents'' or 'resident's'?
Suggestion: residents'; resident's
...ors couldve come into play. Perhaps the residents intake of Aspirin coincided during the ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 135, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...flavor additives? If this substance has a odious smell, people would develop an a...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, however, if, so, still, therefore, while, as to, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 13.0 28.8173652695 45% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1800.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 322.0 441.139720559 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.5900621118 5.12650576532 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23607819155 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.94355552279 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.642857142857 0.468620217663 137% => OK
syllable_count: 578.7 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.3667923341 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.0 119.503703932 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.1 23.324526521 69% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.3 5.70786347227 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.253077821463 0.218282227539 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0614496658638 0.0743258471296 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0637813446998 0.0701772020484 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.112556611923 0.128457276422 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0735932823561 0.0628817314937 117% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 38.31 48.3550499002 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.85 12.5979740519 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.97 8.32208582834 120% => OK
difficult_words: 113.0 98.500998004 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.