People develop their behavior depending on the way in which they have been brought up, their environment and the society in which they live. The behavior of people is determined by external elements, but people have the liberty of making the choice to behave in a particular manner and they are solely responsible for their behavior. The external forces do not determine the behavior of people in a major way as people can take the decision to fight the external forces and behave in a manner that opposes the forces. Therefore, it is true to an extent that the behavior of people is influenced by forces that may not be under their control, but it is highly unjustified to assume that the concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction.
Individual responsibility plays a very important role in determining the behavior of people. Take for instance the behavior of students. External forces like the requirement of doing well in one's studies for getting a good job play a significant role in determining a student's behavior with respect to his studies. However, it is ultimately the student's individual responsibility that will determine the exact nature of his behavior. A particular student can choose not to be influenced by this external force and he may decide not to devote time to his studies despite the irreversible effects it may have on his career. On the other hand, there may be a student who chooses to be influenced by this external force and he puts in his level best in studying for doing well in his life. Thus, it can be seen that the behavior of students with respect to their studies is not influenced as much by an external force as compared to their own individual responsibilities.
It is true that external forces like those pertaining to society, schools, parents, law etc. determine the behavior of people to a significant extent. People stay within a set of laid down norms as per the laws that have been enforced. People of a particular country may be more responsible towards cleanliness by not throwing garbage on the streets as the laws of their country prohibit them from behaving in such a manner. When the same people go to another country where there are no such laws, it is their sense of individual responsibility that will come into play and they may choose to behave in a particular manner depending on how responsible they are towards keeping their environment clean.
There are people who choose to break the laws that have been enforced and this is evident by the crime rate that exists in almost all societies. What about the effect of external forces on these people? These people may have no control over the external forces like law and order, but they have decided not to let the external forces determine their behavior. Moreover, they have taken the decision to ignore the responsibilities that they should shoulder and so they alone are responsible for their conduct. No other force can be held responsible for their behavior.
A society which chooses not to blame the individuals for their actions can never thrive. There will be mass disobedience of rules and the framework of law and order of the society will break down. Therefore, it is essential that individuals be held responsible for their behavior as they are the ones who have chosen to behave in that particular manner. In sum, it can be said that more than external forces, it is the individual's responsibility that determines his behavior.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 395, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a major way" with adverb for "major"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...do not determine the behavior of people in a major way as people can take the decision to figh...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 192, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...s like the requirement of doing well in ones studies for getting a good job play a s...
^^^^
Line 4, column 269, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
...lay a significant role in determining a students behavior with respect to his studies. H...
^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 420, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'individuals'' or 'individual's'?
Suggestion: individuals'; individual's
...at more than external forces, it is the individuals responsibility that determines his beha...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'moreover', 'so', 'therefore', 'thus', 'well', 'for instance', 'it is true', 'with respect to', 'on the other hand']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.217665615142 0.240241500013 91% => OK
Verbs: 0.171924290221 0.157235817809 109% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0820189274448 0.0880659088768 93% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0378548895899 0.0497285424764 76% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0694006309148 0.0444667217837 156% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.132492113565 0.12292977631 108% => OK
Participles: 0.0488958990536 0.0406280797675 120% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.8046019878 2.79330140395 100% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0315457413249 0.030933414821 102% => OK
Particles: 0.00315457413249 0.0016655270985 189% => OK
Determiners: 0.105678233438 0.0997080785238 106% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0283911671924 0.0249443105267 114% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0268138801262 0.0148568991511 180% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3484.0 2732.02544248 128% => OK
No of words: 593.0 452.878318584 131% => OK
Chars per words: 5.87521079258 6.0361032391 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.93473315629 4.58838876751 108% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.337268128162 0.366273622748 92% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.256323777403 0.280924506359 91% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.185497470489 0.200843997647 92% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.112984822934 0.132149295362 85% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8046019878 2.79330140395 100% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 219.290929204 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.365935919056 0.48968727796 75% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 43.6707065763 55.4138127331 79% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6194690265 121% => OK
Sentence length: 23.72 23.380412469 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.3919855032 59.4972553346 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.36 141.124799967 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.72 23.380412469 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.52 0.674092028746 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.94800884956 101% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.21349557522 77% => OK
Readability: 49.3523777403 51.4728631049 96% => OK
Elegance: 1.42937853107 1.64882698954 87% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.383355144333 0.391690518653 98% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.169493143884 0.123202303941 138% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0961648598886 0.077325440228 124% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.527825540595 0.547984918172 96% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.13605871972 0.149214159877 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.171972747096 0.161403998019 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0658863018355 0.0892212321368 74% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.473133264323 0.385218514788 123% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0476216749462 0.0692045440612 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.29063986222 0.275328986314 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0658086189508 0.0653680567796 101% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.4325221239 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.30420353982 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88274336283 143% => OK
Positive topic words: 12.0 7.22455752212 166% => OK
Negative topic words: 4.0 3.66592920354 109% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 2.70907079646 148% => OK
Total topic words: 20.0 13.5995575221 147% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
---------------------
Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations to cover all aspects.