Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
These days, when we turn on the television, the most often thing that we discern is advertising. In magazine and newspaper we see that advertising has its own page and the design is very attractive. Business firms try to convince people to buy their products. Some entrepreneurs believe that advertising benefits for people, because it gives information about several things that people need when they have a certain problem and it can promote their lives. However, advertising has a bad impact to society, such as; urging people to purchase several products that are not necessary.
Advertising change people perspective about beauty, being cool, smart, and else. In the past time, people buy something because they need it. But in the present time, people buy something because other people think it is cool, or because it is very popular. And this perspective lead people to buy something that they do not need. For example, when people see an advertisement, they suddenly want to buy the product. But after the product was bought, they never use it or wear it. Sometimes, it happens because some advertisements give fake information. Such as; beauty products. People are told that the product make them become more beautiful in 30 days or less. Women who love being pretty will absolutely buy this product, but unfortunately they will feel disappointed because it does not work that way, the product is useless.
In short, advertising is very excessive now days, people have to be smart to observe which product that they should buy or should not buy.
Sentence: These days, when we turn on the television, the most often thing that we discern is advertising.
Description: The fragment most often thing is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace often with adjective
flaws:
No. of Words: 259 350
No. of Different Words: 140 200
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5
better to have 5 paragraphs:
para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree
para 2: reason 1
para 3: reason 2
para 4: reason 3 (optional)
para 5: conclusion
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 259 350
No. of Characters: 1258 1500
No. of Different Words: 140 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.012 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.857 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.601 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 86 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 62 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 35 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.188 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.821 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.438 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.358 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.471 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.138 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5