The graph shows the worldwide market of the mobile phone market for sales in the years 2009 and 2013.

Essay topics:

The graph shows the worldwide market of the mobile phone market for sales in the years 2009 and 2013.

The bar graph shows the number of units sold of different mobile brand. Namely Samsung, Apple, Nokia, LG and ZTE by the period from 2009-2013.

Samsung recorded the highest mobile phone sales. This Samsung brand rose sharply from 200 up to 450 millions every two years. Nokia is the second top leading brand and close to Samsung gross. Basically it is opposite to Samsung brand from 2009 started over 400 million sold and drop to less than 400. And after two years decreased about 250 million. Apple showed that they started from 20 and slowly a rose to 150 million. In contrast, the number of LG mobile phone sold in the whole world with gradually fall of about 120 to 90 million in the whole world market. Lastly ZTE mobile phone sales remain constant over the period as it stayed at about 50 million.

In conclusion, mobile phone Samsung and Apple sold around the world market their is improvement every two years. Except the brand of Nokia declined till end of the year 2013. Apparently ZTE remain steady over the year.

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Average: 6 (2 votes)

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The bar graph shows the number of units sold of different mobile brand.
The bar graph shows the number of units sold in different mobile brands.

Sentence: In conclusion, mobile phone Samsung and Apple sold around the world market their is improvement every two years.
Description: can you re-write this sentence? a lot of errors.

with gradually fall of about 120 to 90 million
with a gradual fall from 120 to 90 million

Except the brand of Nokia declined till end of the year 2013.
Except the brand Nokia, it declined till the end of the year 2013.

Apparently ZTE remain steady over the year.
Apparently ZTE remains steady over the years.

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 13 10
No. of Words: 181 200
No. of Characters: 823 1000
No. of Different Words: 97 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.668 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.547 4.6
Word Length SD: 1.996 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 52 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 30 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 14 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 8 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.923 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.385 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.385 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.377 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.09 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4