The pie charts compare the total electricity’s number in Australia and France in the field of fuel source over a 20 year from 1980 to 2000. (re-write)
The pie charts compare the total electricity’s number in Australia and France in the field of fuel source over a 20 year from 1980 to 2000.
Overall, total electricity production in both countries increase dramatically, while France’ production doubled over a period of 20 years, Australia reckoned 70 % increase of the total production. Besides, the electricity sources were different in both countries under review.
As per the pie charts, coal production in Australia increased noticeably from 50 to 130 units. In comparison with the similar electricity source in France being accounted with 25 percent in both statistic’ year, such trend showed a 80 percent increase. Similarly, hydro power in Australia rose around 16 percent while nuclear power in France had almost ninefold increase in full loan of electricity support. Standing in contrast, the electricity sourcing from natural gas of both countries decreased sharply. Australia experienced 18 percent reductions from 20 units in 1980 to just 2 units in 2000 while France showed a larger 23 percent reduction from 25 to 2 units over 20 years under review.
A more detailed look at the pie charts revealed that the overall changes in percentages in Australia and France was not always similar. While the Australia’s oil production experience a two-fifth decline, from 10 to 2 units, such production in France raised 5 percent increase over the measurement. However, it is obvious that the larger of total electricity production in France supported by the immense growth of nuclear power whereas un-depicted in the Australia.
the total electricity’s number
better: units of electricity production by fuel source
Australia experienced 18 percent reductions from 20 units in 1980 to just 2 units in 2000 while France showed a larger 23 percent reduction from 25 to 2 units over 20 years under review.
Description: how did you get 18% reductions and 23% reductions?
While the Australia’s oil production experience a two-fifth decline
While the Australia’s oil production experienced a two-fifth decline
Sentence: While the Australia's oil production experience a two-fifth decline, from 10 to 2 units, such production in France raised 5 percent increase over the measurement.
Error: two-fifth Suggestion: two fifth
Sentence: However, it is obvious that the larger of total electricity production in France supported by the immense growth of nuclear power whereas un-depicted in the Australia.
Error: un-depicted Suggestion: ?
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Words: 251 200
Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Don't need to calculate the data like 'two-fifth decline', '18% reductions'...
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 11 10
No. of Words: 251 200
No. of Characters: 1303 1000
No. of Different Words: 125 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.98 4.0
Average Word Length: 5.191 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.863 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 106 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 80 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.818 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.308 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.727 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.452 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.638 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4