Dear Mr. Smith,
I am writing to inform you that I will not continue the language course.
As you probably knew, I work as a representative of an insurance company and the ability to convey my thought efficiently is a necessity. I enrolled into your Business English course because a friend of mine who works in a human resources department had recommended your language school as a right place for those who need make their speech more fluent and better sounded. I admit that the piece of advice was a worthwhile one. However, I have been recently promoted to a manager position.
That means I will frequently have to work extended hours, for instance, yesterday I left the office at 10:00 pm and this is going to be a regular practice. Moreover, my novel work does not require me to travel a lot by car. Thus, I am intended to move closer to the headquarter and to sell my private car. Consequently, continuing studying at your language school appears to be implausible.
Finally, the fee for the next term has been paid in advance and I would like to get a full refund. It would be convenient to get my money within a week on a credit card. Additionally, a number of textbooks have been purchased by while studying at your institution, I would like to donate them to your school as a sigh of a good will.
I hope on your prompt response.
Sincerely yours,
Eugene Dubinchuk
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
This is not so closely related to the topic:
I enrolled into your Business English course because a friend of mine who works in a human resources department had recommended your language school as a right place for those who need make their speech more fluent and better sounded.
advised:
I enrolled into your Business English course to make my speech more fluent and better sounded.
need to be straight forward.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 7.5 out of 9
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 249 250
No. of Characters: 1096 1200
No. of Different Words: 153 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.972 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.402 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.699 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 76 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 54 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 39 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.562 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.636 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.438 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.308 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.654 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.102 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5
Dear Sir,
Dear Sir,
"I enrolled into your Business English course because a friend of mine who works in a human resources department had recommended your language school as a right place for those who need make their speech more fluent and better sounded."
I used this structure in order to build a complex grammatical structure. Where should I be straightforward and when I need to showcase my understanding of grammar?
Thank you.
This is not a grammatical
This is not a grammatical issue, but a content related issue. the bold text:
because a friend of mine who works in a human resources department had recommended your language school as a right place for those who need
is not closely related to the topic, so it can be removed.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 229, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'resources'' or 'resource's'?
Suggestion: resources'; resource's
...e a friend of mine who works in a human resources department had recommended your languag...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 263, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
.... Thus, I am intended to move closer to the headquarter and to sell my private car. Consequentl...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, finally, however, moreover, so, thus, while, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 7.48453608247 120% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 4.92783505155 142% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 5.05154639175 99% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 3.03092783505 165% => OK
Pronoun: 35.0 32.9175257732 106% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 26.3917525773 121% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 3.85567010309 156% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1150.0 937.175257732 123% => OK
No of words: 248.0 206.0 120% => OK
Chars per words: 4.63709677419 4.54256449028 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.96837696647 3.78020617076 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79678303009 2.54303337028 110% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 127.690721649 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.612903225806 0.622605031667 98% => OK
syllable_count: 357.3 290.88556701 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.41237113402 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.13402061856 120% => OK
Article: 2.0 0.824742268041 243% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 1.0 1.83505154639 54% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.463917525773 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 1.44329896907 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 12.6804123711 110% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 16.3608247423 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.3801809636 44.8134815571 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 82.1428571429 76.5299724578 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.7142857143 16.8248392259 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.07142857143 4.34317383033 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.29896907216 116% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 2.54639175258 79% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 7.41237113402 148% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.49484536082 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.94845360825 76% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.133686442637 0.216113520407 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0407982347154 0.0766984524023 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.045383233509 0.0603063233224 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0872622212069 0.12726935374 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0652842710956 0.0580467560999 112% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 8.37731958763 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 71.14 70.7449484536 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 3.82989690722 81% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 7.45979381443 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.34 8.71597938144 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 7.59969072165 106% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 41.2886597938 136% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 8.62886597938 127% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 8.54432989691 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 8.15463917526 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 87.0786516854 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.75 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.