For some people, shopping is not just about buying what is necessary, but a form of entertainment. Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?
Give your opinion and examples from your experience.
In these materialistic and hedonistic society, shopping has gained in popularity among many individuals. However, some of them do shopping as a form of an entertainment. As far as I can think, this trend has brought many advantages than disadvantages.
First of all, nowadays, individuals have gone skittish and thus they buy and exchange things too quickly and every individual has a different entertaining way-shopping is no exception to this. For eg, I also like to go to shopping,particularly in weekend in summer season as an entertainment. Doing so, I feel very relaxed and fresh in my mind. Further, this habit helps an individual to escape from a tedium and hectic life as well. Not only it accelerates an individual going social but also escalates his/her extrovert nature to absorb into the growing nature of luxurious lifestyle. Therefore, shopping as an entertainment has been a boon to prove an individual an easy-going and an epicurean.
However, many people on the other side of fence also believe that shopping as an entertainment has resulted into troublesome financial situation. As people tend to buy goods not necessary for day-to-day life, it has abetted to ruin financial strength of family.Therefore, it is aiding an individual to wastrel money blindly in buying worthless items. For eg. One of my friend visits JBHI-FI every third month to upgrade his DSLR camera and thus downgraded his average wealth status which has somehow developed perfidious relationship with his wife as well.
To recapitulate, though the fact that shopping as an entertainment has brought enormous positive ramifications, its darker sides can not be undermined which in many cases has ended up into an obsessive individual.
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this trend has brought many advantages than disadvantages.
this trend has brought more advantages than disadvantages.
Not only it accelerates an individual going social but also escalates his/her extrovert nature
Description: Not only...but also is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?
a boon to prove an individual an easy-going and an epicurean.
a boon to prove an individual an easy-going epicurean.
has resulted into troublesome financial situation
has resulted into a troublesome situation in finance
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Always put a space after punctuation marks. Essay e-rater is sensitive.
Read a good grammar book. You may read this one: http://testbig.com/question/grammar
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 280 350
No. of Characters: 1413 1500
No. of Different Words: 171 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.091 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.046 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.05 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 101 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 60 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.538 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.28 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.846 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.386 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.571 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.113 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5