01/10/2017 Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Many agree the advancement of big supermarkets drives small companies out of business. The trend is believed may have an adverse influence on local communities. I disagree with the prospect and the reasons on which my stance is based will be discussed in details below.
On the one hand, the appearance of big department stores in a neighborhood may be seen as an omen. Firstly, disappearing of small firms that are unable to compete with the giants means there is less money in a local budget; thus, the government cannot finance many social programs that used to help maintain local communities’ well-being. Secondly, places owned by local entrepreneurs often attract public that may interact with one another and learn about gossips, while buying something or being served. If those places are closed, it means fewer interactions between locals and thus the death of the community. Those are several adverse consequences of the trend.
On the other hand, the closure of small businesses may not have a disadvantageous effect. Primarily, the advent of big companies may rather revitalize a neighborhood because many well-established businesses often invest heavily in improving local communities. For example, OSHA that is a Russian chain of department stores usually constructs a park with a playground nearby their novel stores to attract families who may combine visiting the store with playing in the park. Furthermore, the existence of a community is usually based on living on the same territory and having similar interests.
Thus, those who share the passion to pets, reading books or repairing cars will continue to communicate with each other even if all local businesses suddenly disappear. Consequently, the life of community will last. In other words, the death of local companies doesn’t necessarily lead to the death of community that used to host them.
In conclusion, the claim the closure of small firms may destroy local communities appears to be unsound because communities are held by similar interests. Moreover, the advent of big malls may improve the life in the neighborhood.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
The trend is believed may have an adverse influence on local communities.
The trend that is believed may have an adverse influence on local communities.
The trend is believed to have an adverse influence on local communities.
to attract families who may combine visiting
to attract families which may combine visiting
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flaws:
Don't repeat same styles or words, like: that used to, may
that used to help maintain
the death of community that used to host them.
'may' is repeated 8 times.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 338 350
No. of Characters: 1726 1500
No. of Different Words: 185 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.288 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.107 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.87 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 120 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 63 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.882 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.345 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.824 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.317 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.491 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.05 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 173, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'giants'' or 'giant's'?
Suggestion: giants'; giant's
...rms that are unable to compete with the giants means there is less money in a local bu...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, firstly, furthermore, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, thus, well, while, for example, in conclusion, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 13.1623246493 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 10.4138276553 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 13.0 24.0651302605 54% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 41.998997996 114% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1788.0 1615.20841683 111% => OK
No of words: 337.0 315.596192385 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.3056379822 5.12529762239 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28457229495 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.02538226701 2.80592935109 108% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 176.041082164 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.545994065282 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 554.4 506.74238477 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 10.0 2.52805611222 396% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 16.0721442886 106% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.2975951904 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.7461031017 49.4020404114 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.176470588 106.682146367 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8235294118 20.7667163134 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.64705882353 7.06120827912 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.213734247619 0.244688304435 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0701111126727 0.084324248473 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0551048616365 0.0667982634062 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.124779119836 0.151304729494 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0279830360218 0.056905535591 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 13.0946893788 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 50.2224549098 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 11.3001002004 95% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.52 12.4159519038 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.7 8.58950901804 101% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 78.4519038076 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.1190380762 95% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.