Some people think that it is beneficial for children to do paid work while others think that it can be harmful for children Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

Essay topics:

Some people think that it is beneficial for children to do paid work, while others think that it can be harmful for children.
Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Although paid work is thought by some to be a good experience for children, other people think it can be detrimental. In my opinion, I think that paid work can bring about more problems for children compared to any advantages it might bring.
Admittedly, there are some basic benefits of children working for money. Firstly, children can develop an understanding of the value of money. This teaches them that money does not grow on trees and helps them appreciate the hard work needed to earn it. Secondly, they take the first steps in learning how to manage money. Many older children, for instance, have a part time job in order to save for something they would otherwise be unable to afford. Understanding money management, furthermore, is useful when, as adults, they will need to balanced their finances.
Nevertheless, despite the advantages above, I believe children could face serious drawbacks from paid work. One potentially dangerous problem is that it exposes them to exploitation, through slave labour. In some countries that do not enforce children employment laws, they may end up working under extreme conditions or even in life threatening situations for negligible wages. Starting life in this way makes it almost impossible for them to escape poverty as an adult. Another obvious issue is that working may affect a child’s ability to focus on their school work. This is a concern as only with a strong academic performance can a child hope to advance as an adult.
In conclusion, being exploited or struggling with academic grades far outweighs any of the minor benefits that could result from children being involved in work experience.

Votes
Average: 5.7 (11 votes)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 365, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...ny older children, for instance, have a part time job in order to save for something they...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, furthermore, if, may, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, for instance, i think, in conclusion, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 13.1623246493 84% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 10.4138276553 29% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 24.0651302605 112% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 41.998997996 86% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1389.0 1615.20841683 86% => OK
No of words: 273.0 315.596192385 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08791208791 5.12529762239 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.06481385082 4.20363070211 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77271714952 2.80592935109 99% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 176.041082164 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.626373626374 0.561755894193 112% => OK
syllable_count: 423.9 506.74238477 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.2975951904 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 30.5347889027 49.4020404114 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.6 106.682146367 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2 20.7667163134 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.33333333333 7.06120827912 118% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.67935871743 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.386673785054 0.244688304435 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120326914977 0.084324248473 143% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.124585769321 0.0667982634062 187% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.234657003366 0.151304729494 155% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.142812383561 0.056905535591 251% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 13.0946893788 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 50.2224549098 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 11.3001002004 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 12.4159519038 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.81 8.58950901804 103% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 78.4519038076 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.1190380762 91% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.