Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?  People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do.  Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Time is one of the most significant part of life, hence spending time wisely is an essential lesson one must learn. In this regard, todays, some people state that people spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do rather than doing things they should do, others disagree. However, as far as I concerned, I think that people nowadays are doing well their necessary works due to some reasons which I will explore in the following essay.

To begin with, it is undeniable that people nowadays are dynamic. As a matter of fact, most of them are no longer lazy or stagnated because of the fast-paced living styles. They adapt to their environment quickly and attempt to get their job in perfectness. More importantly, people todays know the significant values of time. Therefore, they always save time by doing their assigned work at first and then enjoy their hobby. Consider a work schedule of a part time worker in vegetables shop daily. In fact, their job includes: checking the products, packing the goods, selling to the customer. This job not only requires the assiduousness but also the flexibility from the labor in four to five hours per day. After getting the work done, the worker can enjoy his own time by doing whatever he wants. In short, doing assigned work is priority for people nowadays.

In addition, job’s value is one of the most considerable factor for worker to work hard. In fact, most jobs provide the physical properties for labors to live on themselves and nourish others. In other words, no one can refuse the importance of money to daily life nowadays. More notably, some jobs also bring benefits to others. It is not only the happiness but also the sympathy that the receiver feel. For instance, last summer, I took a job as leader of a volunteer club. This job gave me a opportunity to acknowledge about the poor out there. Also, I could bring the happiness and the physical values to them by doing volunteer job. Indeed, I cannot forget the happy smile from a young boy named Pisza when I gave him a food box for dinner. All in all, people todays are doing their job at their full power because of their jobs’ values.

In conclusion, there is no doubt that people today prefer doing work they should do than work they enjoy. It is not only because their dynamicity but also their jobs’ values. Therefore, people should spend more time doing their work creatively and effectively.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 457, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...ir hobby. Consider a work schedule of a part time worker in vegetables shop daily. In fac...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 95, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...derable factor for worker to work hard. In fact, most jobs provide the physical pr...
^^
Line 5, column 199, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... live on themselves and nourish others. In other words, no one can refuse the impo...
^^
Line 5, column 499, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...r of a volunteer club. This job gave me a opportunity to acknowledge about the po...
^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, so, then, therefore, well, for instance, i think, in addition, in conclusion, in fact, in short, no doubt, as a matter of fact, in other words, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2035.0 1977.66487455 103% => OK
No of words: 425.0 407.700716846 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.78823529412 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54043259262 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51982753296 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.52 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 627.3 618.680645161 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 28.2651226738 48.9658058833 58% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 78.2692307692 100.406767564 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.3461538462 20.6045352989 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5 5.45110844103 138% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.335643594617 0.236089414692 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.092742126215 0.076458572812 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.147170184333 0.0737576698707 200% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.272699003916 0.150856017488 181% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.167646949282 0.0645574589148 260% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 11.7677419355 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 58.1214874552 110% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 10.1575268817 83% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.21 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.