Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in schools

Nowadays, people are facing more and more challenge as they struggle to get ahead. As you can imagine, they should adapt themselves to all-embracing development as possible so as to ensure they have a successful career in the future. However, there are certain considerations and factors every person ought to bear it in their mind to find the most efficient way to pursue success. With regard to success in a future job, controversy surrounds the issue of whether people should improve their social abilities or study hard in schools. As outstanding grades in school give people chances to get access to dream jobs, providing people with more space and platforms for flourishment in their career, some insist that studying hard plays a more crucial role in future job success. However, the information I have learned over last few years leads me to think quite differently, and I am of the opinion that sociability has a more prominent effect on career success in the future than studying hard, and the following explanations will further elaborate on this perspective.

To begin with, having the capability to get along with others will offer chances for promotion. When employers deciding who to promote, they consider the ability to build harmonious corporations in comparison to employees of mediocrity. To illustrate, a person who talks eloquently and is adept at persuading others can be a suitable candidate for a business to attract more customers as well as create an intimate ambiance. My friend Erin, for instance, working as a salesperson in a department store, has social fitness, which gets better sales over their rivals. Thanks to her social fitness, she gets comfortable communications with customers as well as attracts potential ones even in a recession time when many stores close. Her prominent business ability deserves rewards, so she becomes the most well-paid employee in their department store. In a nutshell, social skills, not mere knowledge, can make the difference between success and failure in business, hence working hard in schools benefits one in his job less.

In addition, the ability to relate well to others is significant to improve leadership and become a successful worker. For one thing, a successful worker is more akin to Turner who helps pick up the slack and weather the crisis. With the rapid development of economics, numerous factories and corporations compete intensely to reach a keen interest rate, which brings more risks for companies as they are getting harder and harder to meet customers' demands thanks to various choices available. Thus, picky customers may increase conflicts with companies and even lead to customers boycotts if they are not satisfied. My friend Chloe's experience may shed light on this matter. She works in a make-up firm which applies a style that breaks tradition in its recent products. Unfortunately, customers are not buying it, feeling being deceived as products look different from advertisement as the advertisement does not include the new products. Thus customers raise mountainous complains towards our company. If she does not come up with a feasible plan: apologizing to customers with sincerity and presents, and ensuring that the firm will refund for their expenses and they can pick one product for free, the firm may go bankrupt. Her colleagues see her personality in the crisis, so when she starts up her own business, lots of people are willing to follow her because of her sociability.

Based on the above analysis, I will restate that there are many solid reasons to support the idea of cultivating social skills rather than hard work in schools makes more contributions to career success. While the foundation of well-knit theoretics and comprehensive knowledge enables us to find solutions to difficult issues in a professional area, a good relationship can always survive a business and also gives more opportunities for promotion.

Votes
Average: 9 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 174, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...o all-embracing development as possible so as to ensure they have a successful career in...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 942, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ment does not include the new products. Thus customers raise mountainous complains t...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, if, look, may, so, thus, well, while, as to, for instance, in addition, as well as, for one thing, to begin with, with regard to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 43.0788530466 107% => OK
Preposition: 85.0 52.1666666667 163% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 8.0752688172 211% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3309.0 1977.66487455 167% => OK
No of words: 636.0 407.700716846 156% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20283018868 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.02185627292 4.48103885553 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89422446328 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 344.0 212.727598566 162% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.540880503145 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 1025.1 618.680645161 166% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 60.459388022 48.9658058833 123% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.36 100.406767564 132% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.44 20.6045352989 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.2 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309416203355 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0798326970297 0.076458572812 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0733849606728 0.0737576698707 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.188646726001 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0874129473948 0.0645574589148 135% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 11.7677419355 134% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 58.1214874552 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 10.1575268817 128% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.18 10.9000537634 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.22 8.01818996416 115% => OK
difficult_words: 175.0 86.8835125448 201% => Less difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.