It is crucial for any society to have some individuals who are will to give help and serve their community. I agree with the statement that people these days do not give enough time to help their communities. I will explain the reasons on which my stance is based in the following paragraphs.
To begin with, in the contemporary world the people became more involved in many responsibilities. They have to take care of their families and their work. Providing the basic needs of their families has become more challenging task than it was in the past. That resulted that the social relations between the dwellers of the same street or the even the same building are weak than ever. However, as it known " no man is an island". The human must cooperate with each other to have a healthy sable society. They need to be aware that if everyone just think about his own needs and did contribute with some his effort to the community around him, that would have negative impact on the whole nation. The atmosphere of selfishness and isolation is put the whole country at the risk of collapsing. Throughout the history, the nations that its individuals has some level of altruism managed to overcome all the obstacles it faced and it finally reached the safe side. On the other hand, these nations who were engulfed by the behaviors of indifference of the public interest suffered form severe consequences.
Furthermore, it is so common in the current days to see some societies where the majority of the population are under the middle class, whereas a very small ratio of the people are possess the most of the wealth of the country. This unfair and unjust distribution of wealth would not be possible if those rich individuals have done their duties towards their society. They could have establish projects, factories, and companies that offer well-paid jobs for the majority of population. It will not benefit the poor only, on the contrary, it will help those rich people to live in more stable and safe society. The eradication of poverty and unemployment is a keystone to keeping a healthy and dynamic society. A closer look to the world around us will indicate that these communities that promote the value of sharing the responsibility and caring for each other put this countries on the right track, in contrast, those countries who do not have these values or attitudes are often suffering form chronic problems.
To recap, I think that people in societies today do not give enough time to their communities because they busy with their private business more than the public matters.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 56, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...or any society to have some individuals who are will to give help and serve their commu...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 632, Rule ID: NOUN_AROUND_IT[1]
Message: Consider using 'the surrounding community'?
Suggestion: the surrounding community
... did contribute with some his effort to the community around him, that would have negative impact on the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 182, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'possessed'.
Suggestion: possessed
...as a very small ratio of the people are possess the most of the wealth of the country. ...
^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 385, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'established'.
Suggestion: established
... towards their society. They could have establish projects, factories, and companies that...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 869, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...nsibility and caring for each other put this countries on the right track, in contra...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, furthermore, however, if, look, so, well, whereas, i think, in contrast, on the contrary, on the whole, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 52.1666666667 111% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2167.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 445.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.86966292135 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.59293186426 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65452523613 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.519101123596 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 687.6 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.8545665178 48.9658058833 120% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.35 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.25 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.5 5.45110844103 138% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.252223528725 0.236089414692 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0738367189534 0.076458572812 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.128284039641 0.0737576698707 174% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.209285732768 0.150856017488 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.131621241965 0.0645574589148 204% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 11.7677419355 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 86.8835125448 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.